


The Future King

by goldthatglistens



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canon Rewrite, F/M, Good Morgana (Merlin), M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:54:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 34,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25459672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldthatglistens/pseuds/goldthatglistens
Summary: A Merlin fix-it in which Morgana never becomes evil, Arthur finds out about Merlin’s magic, Lancelot lives, and Arthur becomes a great king with a long life with Merlin by his side.Quick summary: Arthur is having terrible nightmares about a future Camelot with an evil Morgana. The nightmares always end in the same way: a long bloody battle ends with his death by a man he does not recognize. When Gaius gives Arthur a sleeping potion, Arthur is relieved that the dreams have stopped. However, he is then horrified to find that he is now stuck with an old sorcerer with a long white beard making making mostly annoying, but sometimes helpful comments inside his head. On top of the old sorcerer's snarky comments, Arthur must deal with evil giants, kidnappings, and the emotional turmoil of falling in love with his servant.
Relationships: Gwen/Lancelot (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 127





	1. The King

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place sometime before Morgana becomes evil. It's been a while since I watched the show, so I apologize if any characters show up here that hadn't been introduced before Morgana became evil. Please let me know if anything doesn't make sense. 
> 
> Also, sorry for any grammatical errors or weird formatting!

Arthur was having recurring nightmares. 

In his nightmares, Morgana had wild eyes, unkempt hair and a murderous personality. He watched as she plotted to murder him, his father, Gwen, and even Merlin. He saw a dragon destroy half of Camelot and he looked on, helpless, as armies of undying soldiers descended upon Camelot. The dreams always ended the same way. After watching his father die and his knights die, Arthur would be stabbed by a brown-haired young man. Merlin would cradle Arthur’s body in his arms and weep. 

However, this nightmare was different from the rest. While watching the terrible battles unfolding across the dreamscape of his mind, an old man with a long white beard popped up and flickered, before solidifying.

“These dreams will soon be true, Arthur,” the old man gestured at the clashing bodies surrounding them. “These dreams will soon be true if you don’t find your destiny and open your heart.” 

Arthur turned to the man. “What destiny? Open my heart to what?” 

The old man sighed. “You will find that you are only one side of a coin. You will meet the one who makes yourself whole, if you are able to not only use your strength, but also your compassion.” 

“I will be on the side of a coin when I am king,” said Arthur. “What does that have to do with anything?” 

“No, it is a metaphor, you ass. The metaphor is that you are but one side of a coin.” The old man sighed and then muttered under his breath, “Though, I’m afraid you are the duller side. The other side is much much brighter.” 

“You dare to insult me, old man?” threatened Arthur. 

The old man rolled his eyes and said, “Just don’t be such a prat about --” and the dream ended suddenly.

Arthur sat up panting in his bed. It was still dark and the castle was quiet. There was no sign of any sort of old sorcerers or any sign of evil Morgana. His father was still alive. Arthur took a deep breath and laid back in bed. He resolved to Gaius for a sleeping draught because this was simply unacceptable. Perhaps he had been eating bad bread. He should ask if anyone else had been having nightmares. 

Arthur was just falling asleep when Merlin opened the curtains with a cheery, “Rise and shine, sire!” 

Arthur groaned and put his head under his pillow. 

“Oh, come on Arthur,” said Merlin in an inordinately cheerful voice. “You’ve got a princess to see and it is a beautiful day today!” 

The pillow was ripped away from Arthur’s head. Arthur squinted blearily at Merlin. “What’s got you so cheerful this morning? I should outlaw that. Cheerfulness in the morning. I’ll send you to the stocks.” 

Merlin didn’t respond, but just stood there staring at Arthur with his mouth slightly open.

“What’s the matter with you?” asked Arthur squinting at Merlin in the brightness of the morning.

‘“What’s the matter with you?” Merlin asked back. “You look awful!” 

“Shut up, Merlin.” Arthur closed his eyes again and flopped an arm over his eyes. “Help me get dressed.”

“No, you really do!” said Merlin. “You look absolutely terrible. I should go get Gaius.” Arthur cracked open an eye and carefully inspected Merlin’s face for any evidence of a joke. He found none; Merlin looked genuinely concerned.

“What’s wrong with me?” asked Arthur, patting his face with concern. “Merlin. Answer me.” 

“You don’t look well.” Merlin wrinkled his brow and pouted his lips with concern. “Did you get any sleep last night? Or the night before?” 

“Yes!” said Arthur. “I slept. I just had a strange dream last night.”

Merlin gave Arthur a skeptical look. “I’m going to get Gaius. He’ll know what’s wrong with you.” Merlin swiftly turned and made to leave the room. 

“Merlin!” cried Arthur. “Come back here. Did you even bring me breakfast?” He waited hopefully for an answer, but Merlin had already exited. 

Arthur groaned. He really didn’t feel that good at all. His father was entertaining Princess Olwen who was a potential political match for Arthur. Princess Olwen’s father was a rather brutal king who had caused much trouble for Camelot. It was important that Arthur made a good impression. 

Arthur was finding Princess Olwen rather difficult to court. While she was soft, sweet, and demure, she was rather too shy, acting almost as if she were scared of Arthur. When she did speak, she did so softly and hesitantly, as if she were afraid of speaking out of turn. 

Arthur rolled over so he was sitting on the side of his bed and reached for a silver tray that Merlin had left behind (being the useless servant that he was). Arthur looked at his reflection in the tray and grimaced. He had dark crescent shadows underneath his eyes and his hair looked like a birds nest. He tried to flatten his hair down on his head, but his hair merely spring back to it’s unruly position. He sighed. He didn’t want Princess Olwen to be any more scared of him than she already was. 

The door burst open and Merlin rushed in closely followed by Gaius. “See how horrible he looks, Gaius?” Merlin was practically dancing with nervous energy. “I told you it was an emergency.” 

“Shut up, Merlin,” Arthur said. “I don’t look that bad.”

Gaius frowned at Arthur. “Have you been having problems sleeping, sire?” 

“I’ve been able to fall asleep,” explained Arthur. “But I have been having rather terrible dreams of late.” 

Gaius’s frown deepened. “What is the content of these dreams?” 

In the daylight, Arthur felt a little embarrassed about his dreams. “Just some terrible scenarios. Magic entering Camelot.” Merlin winced in sympathy. 

“I can prescribe you some sleeping draughts,” said Gaius. “I’ve been giving some to Morgana and they have been working quite well.” 

“Thank you, Gaius,” said Arthur. 

“In the meantime, I can give you a brew called buna that is known to give extra energy. The brew is made from the seeds of a very exotic plant.” Gaius pulled out a flask with dark brown liquid in it. 

Arthur opened the flask. The flask had a pleasing roasted earthy smell to it. Arthur took a cautious sip.

“Bleagh,” Arthur nearly spat out the brew. “It’s so bitter.”

“Apologies, sire,” said Gauis. He waved his hand in the air to indicate Arthur was to drink the rest of the brew. 

Arthur screwed up his face and downed the whole bottle. The brew left an unpleasant taste on his tongue, but Arthur did notice that he seemed more alert throughout the day. 

Instead of his usual morning practice with the knights, he took Princess Olwen on a picnic in the forest. She sat politely on the blanket, shyly surrounded by curtains of red hair, and watched Arthur with rather blank brown eyes as he attempted to regale her with stories of the court of Camelot. He silently thanked Gaius for the energy given by the brew, when a more energetic story managed to get her to smile.

After, Gaius’s brew helped Arthur get through several long and rather boring meetings with his father’s advisor about a new and improved way of counting wheat. Arthur even made it through the nightly feast without falling asleep, but by the end of the feast, he was ready to sleep. 

Merlin helped Arthur undress and gave Arthur the sleeping draught from Gaius. Arthur fell asleep the instant his head hit his pillow. 

That night there were no terrifying dreams, just the faint impression of the old man with the long white beard muttering about magic sleeping potions. 

When Arthur awoke the next day, he felt refreshed like he hadn’t felt in days. Arthur got out of bed and opened the curtains. It was morning, well past the time he was supposed to be up. Arthur’s stomach rumbled. He saw that Merlin had yet to bring breakfast.

“MERLIN!” Arthur bellowed. Where was he? 

_ I forgot how much of a prat you were when you were younger _ , said a voice. 

“Hello?” Arthur called cautiously. “Who is it?” Arthur drew his sword from the side of his bed, but accidentally hit the hangings on the bed and face planted on the bed.

Someone sniggered loudly. 

Arthur propelled himself up from the bed and brandished his sword wildy. 

“Who is there?” Arthur yelled. “I command you to reveal yourself.” 

_ Don’t be an idiot, Arthur _ , said the voice.  _ No one is there. It’s just me _ .

“Where are you? Show yourself, you coward.” Arthur moved around the room, looking for the source of the voice. No matter where he went, it appeared as though the voice was coming from right behind him.

_ I can’t show myself _ , said the voice.  _ I’m trapped in your head. Luckily, there’s lots of space in here as there really isn’t much here _ .

“No,” said Arthur. “You’re playing tricks on me. This must be magic.”

_ It is magic, you doofus _ , the voice said.  _ You’ve seen me before. I’m the sorcerer from your dream _ . 

Arthur remembered the old man with the long white beard that haunted his dream last night. “Why are you here?” asked Arthur. “Go away.” 

_ I wish I could, Arthur _ , said the voice.  _ But without me, you’ll die _ . 

“I refuse to believe that,” said Arthur. “You are clearly trying to influence me. I will tell my father and you will be persecuted for this act of treason.”

_ Arthur, I know that you lack substance in your head, but you can’t be that stupid. Your plan is to go to your father and tell him that you are hearing voices of a sorcerer in your head? The only way he can get me out of your head is to cut your head off.  _

“So is that your plan?” asked Arthur. “To get me killed?”

_ NO _ , the voice sighed.  _ Weren’t you listening at all, turnip head? I’m trying to keep you alive. If you fulfill your destiny to become one of the greatest kings that ever lived, I promise you I will be able to depart and leave you in peac _ e.  _ I can only live if you live, so I gain nothing by your death. _

“May I at least know the name of the annoying voice in my head if I am to be stuck with it until I become king?” asked Arthur. 

_ I have many names _ , said the voice.  _ You will eventually come to know me by those names. But for now, you can call me Myrddin _ .

“Alright,” said Arthur. “If you want to keep me alive, will you do me the courtesy of shutting up? As you said, if I reveal that there is a sorcerer's voice in my head, this may end badly for me.”

_ Of course, sire. Anything you ask for,  _ said Myrddin in an annoyingly smarmy voice.

Arthur strongly felt that he was being made fun of, but was suddenly too tired to deal with it. He sat down on the bed and put his head in his hands. It seemed like he had moved out of the frying pan right into the fire. He preferred nightmares over the annoying voice in his head.

The door crashed open and Merlin came running in, a plate of food balanced precariously in his hands.

“Rise and shine!” Merlin beamed at him and put his breakfast tray down on the table. “How are you feeling today, Arthur?”

“If you came when you were supposed to, I would be having a wonderful day!” growled Arthur grabbing a piece of bread.

“Someone’s hungry,” teased Merlin. Arthur threw a piece of bread at his head. 

“Where were you, Merlin? What took you so long?” 

Merlin shifted uncomfortably. “Gaius wanted me to help him make a potion,” Merlin wouldn’t meet his eyes. 

“You are a terrible liar, Merlin,” chidded Arthur. “I bet you were at the tavern again.” 

“All right, you caught me,” sighed Merlin. “I was definitely at the tavern at the break of dawn drinking barrels of ale.”

Inside Arthur’s head, Myrddin sniggered. Arthur ignored him. “You have a problem, Merlin,” said Arthur as he took a big bite of bread. “Maybe Gaius can help. Have you asked him about it?” 

“Speaking of your problem,” Merlin dodged the question. “Did the sleeping draught help?” 

“Yes, it did. Thank Gaius for me, will you?”

“Will do,” said Merlin. “Gaius also sent me another of the buna brew.” Merlin pulled out a glass bottle and put it in front of Arthur.

Arthur took a small sip and made a face. “Ugh, that tastes disgusting.”

“Drink up,” smirked Merlin. His eyes twinkled as he watched Arthur gulp down the bitter brew. 

Arthur pointed at Merlin. “You were late today. For that, you’ll have to go muck out my stables, clean my armor, shine my boots, and fix the hole in my red tunic.” 

Merlin pouted a bit, but then bounded out of the room with more energy than Arthur had seen before. 

“What’s up with him?” asked Arthur. 

_ He’s been sampling your espresso shot _ , said Myrddin.  _ He likes the taste _ .

“What?” Arthur wrinkled his nose in confusion. Then he shook his head. “No, don’t answer that. That was a hypothetical question.” 

_ As you wish, sire _ , came the smarmy voice again.

“Of all the sorcerer’s I could have been stuck with, I had to be stuck with such an annoying ass!” Arthur complained heatidly. 

_ The feeling is mutual, prat _ . Despite all the name calling, Arthur didn’t get the feeling that Myrddin was annoyed. Strangely, he felt that Myrddin was rather enjoying himself. 

Myrddin mercifully stayed silent all day, though Arthur thought he might have heard a snigger when Arthur somehow managed to bash himself on the head with his shield after insulting Merlin. 

However, that night at the banquet with Princess Olwen, Myrddin started muttering in Arthur’s head causing Arthur to slop some of his wine onto himself. 

“Will you shut up, Myrddin?” Arthur whispered furiously into his hand.

Arthur felt a touch on his shoulder and looked into Merlin’s laughing eyes. “More wine, sire?” asked Merlin. 

Arthur nodded and the anger at Myrddin loosened as he watched Merlin pour wine, that ridiculous neckerchief around his neck. When Arthur first met Merlin, Arthur thought he was a funny looking thing with ears big enough to fly with and scrawny little limbs. Now, Arthur found himself admiring the sharpness of Merlin’s cheekbones, the pretty blue of his eyes, the slight curve of his lips as he smiled, and the--

“Prince Arthur?” murmured Princess Olwen in a quiet little voice. Arthur tore his eyes away from Merlin and turned back to her. 

“Sorry, Princess,” Arthur apologized. “I’m afraid I haven’t been getting enough sleep. I believe you were talking about the sweet plums?” 

Princess Olwen’s reply was drowned out by Myrddin letting loose a long amused  _ hmmmm _ . 

When Princess Olwen had been distracted by an offer of a new glass of wine by Gewn, Arthur muttered, “Shut up!”

_ I haven’t said anything _ , replied Myrddin. _ I'll just be in your head, making no noise and pretending I'm not here.  _

“Good,” said Arthur savagely.

“What was that?” asked Princess Olwen meekly. 

“Er, the food is good, I said,” responded Arthur. He smiled at Princess Olwen soothingly. “Delicious.”

“Oh yes, it is indeed,” Princess Olwen nodded her head enthusiastically. “Everything is cooked to perfection.” She blushed and looked down at her lap. 

“I am pleased you are enjoying your stay at Camelot,” said Arthur. He wished the the princess would stop behaving like a startled deer in his presence. 

“It is much to my liking,” Princess Olwen gave Arthur a small sweet smile. 

“Excellent,” replied Arthur. “Excellent...” He trailed off and cleared his throat, searching for something else to say. 

Arthur was spared from future conversation, when the doors to the hall opened and a large man stepped inside. He moved stiffly and carefully, as though he weren’t used to walking on his legs. His red robes billowed around him and a heavy golden crown encircled his wispy red hair. 

“Ah, King Custennin,” King Uther rose to welcome him. “We didn’t expect you for another week.” 

_ Uh oh _ , Myrddin muttered.  _ This is different _ . 

“My plans changed,” grinned King Custennin. The smile didn’t quite reach his eyes and Arthur couldn’t help but to shiver. 

King Uther called for servants to bring up a chair, and King Custennin joined them at the table. The rest of the meal passed uneventfully except the more King Custennin talked, the more uneasy Arthur felt. 

When Arthur finally made it back to his room, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He wasn’t sure why he reacted so strongly to King Custennin, but something about him put Arthur on edge. Arthur thought it may be the king’s smile, which seemed forced, or the king’s cold glittering eyes taking in Camelot with a hungry look.

_ You mustn’t trust King Custennin _ , warned Myrddin.  _ There is something different about him, something wrong. He reeks of blood magic _ .

“I noticed it too,” said Arthur, remembering the unease filling his body and he shuddered.

_ I doubt it _ , said Myrddin.  _ You’re about as magical as a pile of turds _ . 

“Excuse me!” cried Arthur. “Let me remind you who you are talking to.” 

_ Alas it is true, my princely turd _ , Myrddin sniggered. Then in a more serious tone, he continued.  _ You must be feeling residual magic from me. Hmmm. _

“I don’t want any magic!” cried Arthur. “How do I know that the feeling of unease doesn’t come from you?” 

_ Magic won’t tarnish you, even if you did possess any sort of magical ability (which you don’t),  _ Myrddin replied.  _ Magic is a bit like a knife. It depends upon how you use it _ . 

“Magic has only brought terror and chaos to Camelot,” said Arthur. “My kingdom has seen it’s effects. I have seen it’s effects firsthand. Even my servant was nearly killed by magic.” 

Myrddin chuckled a little before he replied.  _ Arthur, if you only saw knife wielding maniacs, you would think that knives bring terror and chaos. But it’s not the knife's fault; knives are handled and controlled by people. Knives can also do much good, like help with cooking, protection, or entertainment.  _

“No,” said Arthur. “Magic corrupts people. Magic makes them evil.” 

_ What do you know about magic, Arthur? You are speaking to a sorcerer _ . 

“Every instance of magic I have encountered has been evil,” said Arthur. 

_ Every instance of magic that you have seen _ , replied Myrddin.  _ Some prefer to keep their talents hidden.  _

“You are full of lies and poison,” sneered Arthur. 

“Are you really that upset about me being late, Arthur?” said Merlin. Arthur jumped and saw Merlin leaning by the door with a fake earnest face. “I was really helping Gaius, you know. You can ask him yourself.” 

“No, I was just…” Arthur waved his hand in the air and paused to think. “I was just going over a speech.” 

“A speech?’ asked Merlin, an amused smile blossoming on his face. “Who is this speech for? I would love to hear it.” Merlin’s blue eyes crinkled at the corners and Arthur felt his heart pound strangely. 

“It is not for your ears, Merlin,” chidded Arthur. 

“Mainly because what you said is a whole load of codswallop,” Merlin said cheekily while helping Arthur get undressed. 

“What did you say, Merlin?” Arthur asked threateningly, but the effect was rather ruined as his head was stuck in his tunic. 

“Don’t worry your big head about it,” responded Merlin, rescuing Arthur from his tunic. 

Arthur was going to have a witty response, but being free of his tunic he was suddenly inundated by Merlin’s stunning blue eyes, wonderful pink mouth, deliciously sharp cheekbones-- 

Merlin’s mouth quirked. “Alright, Arthur?” 

“Yes,” said Arthur. “I was just overwhelmed by your smell. Did you just come from mucking out the stables?”

( _ Liar _ , coughed Myrddin.)

Merlin just laughed and tackled Arthur. “Are you sure it isn’t your breath? I am sometimes stunned by it as well.”

“Get off me, you crazy git!” shouted Arthur. “What’s the matter with you, Merlin?” Arthur easily managed to pin Merlin to the ground, holding Merlin’s wrists above his head with one hand. 

“Dunno,” said Merlin. “Just happy, I guess.” Merlin smiled at Arthur. Merlin’s cheeks were turning a pretty pink.

“I’ll never understand what’s going on in that strange head of yours, Merlin,” said Arthur. He was quite close to Merlin’s face. He could count everyone of Merlin’s eyelashes if he wished. 

“That’s alright, Arthur,” said Merlin. “Wouldn’t want to overwhelm you with more than you can handle.” 

Merlin gazed up at Arthur, eyes widened in a faux innocent manner. Merlin’s breath was warm and despite what Arthur said before, Merlin smelled really good. Arthur felt as though he could not take enough breath. If Merlin was a girl and not a boy servant, Arthur would prefer Merlin to any of the princesses he had seen. Arthur really wanted to lean down, press his lips to Merlin’s and--

“Did you gain some weight recently, Arthur?” asked Merlin. “You are rather heavy.” 

Arthur groaned and smacked Merlin’s arm. “Get up, you idiot. I’ll see you tomorrow in the morning. You better not be late.” 

“Of course, Arthur,” Merlin said earnestly. “Good night. I left your sleeping draught next to your bed.” 

“Night, Merlin,” said Arthur. He downed the sleeping potion and settled in his bed. 

For some reason, all that was coming to mind was Merlin’s face beneath him as he was pinned to the floor by Arthur. As Arthur slipped into sleep, he dreamed of dark curly hair and laughing blue eyes just out of reach. 

***

Arthur woke up to Merlin enthusiastically yelling, “Good morning, Arthur! Up you get.” 

“Merlin,” Arthur groaned. “My day was going so well until you were in it.” 

Merlin threw the blankets back from the bed and peered down at Arthur. “You must have missed me a lot yesterday.” 

Arthur stretched and yawned. When he turned back to Merlin, he could have sworn that Merlin was staring at his chest. 

“What are you looking at?” asked Arthur. 

“I’m checking to see if we need to change your diet,” Merlin smiled. “We want you to be the fittest of all the knights!” He gave Arthur’s stomach a little pat and Arthur glared at him.

“I am the fittest of all the knights!” cried Arthur. “I can beat every one of them.” 

Merlin gave Arthur a questioning look. “Whatever you say, Arthur.” Arthur tossed an apple at Merlin’s head. 

Merlin caught it. “Thanks, Arthur!” He took a big bite out of the apple and grinned.

Arthur threw himself back on the bed. “Why do I have the most annoying and incompetent servant in all of Camalot?” 

“If you don’t like me, we can always go back to George,” said Merlin. “Otherwise, get up so you can get dressed.”

“Please no George,” groaned Arthur. “The last time he was here, I told him to talk to me and he started a conversation about polishing pewter.” Arthur got out of bed and Merlin helped him dress. He scarfed down his breakfast and went downstairs to train with the knights. 

The princess was in attendance to watch him train, so he first stopped by to say hello. She was sitting on a blanket, covered with an umbrella and popping grapes into her mouth. Her posture had changed since Arthur had last seen her; she was sitting up straighter than Arthur had seen before. Her hair wasn’t covering her face, but was pulled back in a tight bun.

“Are you doing well, Princess Olwen?” Arthur bowed to Princess Olwen and took her hand to kiss.

“I’m doing quite fine, thank you. I’ve got a big strong prince to protect me.” Princess Olwen ran her hand down Arthur’s arm, batted her eyelashes, and bit her lip. 

Arthur almost stepped back in shock. Princess Olwen had certainly gotten more forward since she first arrived. Two days ago, she was too shy to even make eye contact. Now, Arthur could very clearly see her brown eyes unobscured by her red hair. Arthur was surprised to notice that the brown of her eyes appeared to be muted, as though they were cloudy with a white film.

“I’m glad you are feeling comfortable, princess,” Arthur said, feeling a bit uncomfortable himself. 

“Got your stuff, sire,” Merlin clambered over to Arthur, nearly dragging his sword through the mud. 

“Merlin!” cried Arthur. His heart skipped a beat when he saw Merlin; he was so relieved to be rescued from the princess. “It’s about time you arrived.” 

“You were the one who wanted me to do all those chores yesterday,” Merlin replied. “I was up late polishing your armor! I didn’t get a chance to put things back properly” 

“That’s no excuse, Merlin,” said Arthur. He turned to Princess Olwen. “Forgive me, I must leave you to go to practice.” 

She offered her hand to be kissed again, but as Arthur took her hand to kiss it, she gave him a kiss on the cheek instead. “Good luck, my handsome prince. My heart throbs loathsomely at our parting.” 

“Er, yes,” said Arthur whilst awkwardly nodding. “Mine as well, princess.” He eagerly followed Merlin away from the princess. 

“Would you like me to help with your armor, my handsome prince?” teased Merlin, batting his eyelashes. 

Arthur meant to laugh, but was taken aback by the beautiful blue of Merlin’s eyes. 

Merlin sniffed in fake indignation. “Well, if you don’t want my help, you can just do it yourself.” 

“Merlin,” said Arthur. 

“What?” 

“You’re an idiot. Have I mentioned that before?.” 

“Thank you, sire.” 

Arthur rolled his eyes and Merlin ducked his head and smiled. 

Once Merlin had finished helping Arthur with his armor, Merlin paused, his head tilted in thought. “Princess Olwen came on a bit stronger than before, do you think?”

“A bit stronger,” said Arthur. “She seems like an entirely different person.”

“Hmm,” Merlin pursued his lips and Arthur couldn’t help but to look at them. “She did get bolder after her father came, didn’t she?” 

“Yes, that’s true,” agreed Arthur. “Maybe she was just shy before.” 

“Maybe,” said Merlin. He put his hand on Arthur’s shoulder. “Be careful, okay?” Merlin’s worried blue eyes framed by black eyelashes blinked into his face. 

Arthur’s mouth somehow felt a little dry and he swallowed. “Aren’t I always careful? It’s you I need to worry about.” 

_ Haha _ , snorted Myrddin. Arthur ignored him. 

Arthur worked his knights hard. It was important to show to the princess the might and power of the Camelot knights; it was even more essential to prove his strength as the future leader of Camelot. Uther and Arthur both knew that the princess reported directly back to the king, who would be making a decision about who the princess would marry. Arthur remembered Merlin’s comments about his weight this morning. Instead, Arthur imagined Merlin calling him fit and strong, which filled his stomach with all sorts of wonderful bubbly feelings. He used this feeling to put extra force into his sparing with the other knights. 

He must have been hitting harder than usual because after practice, Sir Kay slapped Arthur on the shoulder. “That was a hard practice. Showing off for the little lady out there?” Sir Kay winked. 

“Just making sure you all don’t get lazy,” replied Arthur. For some reason, the image of piercing blue eyes and a cheeky smile kept flashing in his head. 

“Alright, sire,” Sir Kay smiled. “Whatever you say.” He gave Arthur’s shoulder another friendly shove before walking away to talk to Leon. 

Merlin came bounding up with that stupid little grin of his just as Arthur reached his chamber door. “Well, you certainly got muddy out there.” 

“Don’t talk and help me get this off,” snapped Arthur. “My head hurts.” He entered his chamber and put down his helmet. 

“Well, you did get some blows to the head,” teased Merlin. “I’d be worried if I didn’t know how hard your head is.” Merlin laughed and blinked beautiful blue eyes up at Arthur. Arthur frowned. 

“I bested every single knight,” said Arthur. “In record time, I may add.” 

“Right,” said Merlin, sounding unconvinced. He started to take off Arthur’s armor. 

“You saw me,” argued Arthur. “I won every match.” 

“Well, of course they let you win,” exclaimed Merlin. “You’re the prince!” 

“They didn’t let me win,” protested Arthur. “You’ve seen me in battle before fighting people who didn’t know I was the prince.” 

“Yes,” said Merlin. “I didn’t say you couldn’t win some of the time.” 

Arthur sighed. Merlin was infuriating. “I am the fittest knight, not because I am the prince, but because I train the hardest.” 

Merlin peered up at him while undoing a buckle. “Is this about our conversation this morning? About you being fit?” 

“No,” said Arthur. 

“It is, isn’t it. You were offended.” 

“I was not.” Arthur folded his arms stubbornly.

“Well, you certainly did do a lot of work pushing all those knights into the mud.” 

“Merlin.” 

“Yes, Arthur?”

“Go get me a bath. Now.” 

“Of course, Arthur.” 

Once Merlin had finished lugging all of the water for the bath up the stairs to Arthur’s room and Arthur had sunk into the warm water, Arthur felt a lot better. He opened his eyes to see Merlin staring at him with a strange expression. 

“What is it, Merlin?” 

“You’ve got a bit of mud,” murmured Merlin. He motioned to the right side of his face. Arthur scrubbed his face and looked back at Merlin.

Merlin shook his head. “No, you’ve missed it entirely. Here.” Merlin leaned over and gently used his thumb to wipe something off of Arthur’s face. Merlin’s hands were cool and smooth against the heat of the bath. 

“Thank you,” breathed Arthur. Merlin’s face was still entirely too close to Arthur’s body. 

“You know, you may not be the fittest knight,” said Merlin. Arthur opened his mouth to protest, but Merlin placed a cool finger on Arthur’s lips and Arthur instantly became silent. “But you are the best knight. It’s clear in the strength and agility with which you move. The best part is your triumph. You do not goad or boast after your opponents defeat. You take my breath away.” Merlin only breathed the last sentence, so Arthur couldn’t be sure if he heard it right. 

Before Arthur could ask what Merlin said, Merlin sprang up and gave Arthur a hearty nudge on the head. “Now don’t let that get to your head, cabbage brain.” 

As Merlin scampered out of the room, Arthur could have sworn that Merlin’s face was bright red. 

“How strange,” remarked Arthur. “I don’t know what goes on in that weird head of his.” 

_ Hmmm _ , replied Myrddin.  _ I don’t think there was anything on your face to begin with _ .

“What does that mean?” asked Arthur. 

_ Figure it out yourself _ , Myrddin responded and went silent no matter how many questions Arthur asked. 

***

Dinner was quite a production as King Uther pulled out all of the stops to impress King Custennin. 

Arthur spent the beginning of half of it trying to escape the wandering touches of Princess Olwen as she chatted about something that Arthur had long given up on trying to follow. Arthur couldn’t understand why Princess Olwen had a sudden shift in personality, but he found himself longing for the shy, meek princess to return.

About halfway through the dinner, King Custennin summoned servants to bring a decorated box onto the table. 

“I have a treat to you all, for being such spectacular hosts,” said King Custennin grinning at Uther and Arthur. 

“We are pleased to have you,” responded Uther. 

King Custennin opened the box and revealed a small cake. “This is a special confectionary that is considered a treat in our lands. We hope to share it with you to exchange customs. Unfortunately, as the supplies are expensive, we only have enough for the King and Prince Arthur, and not for the entire court to share.”

_ Don’t eat that cake, Arthur _ , Myrddin warned urgently.  _ It’s poisoned. _

“I have to eat the cake,” Arthur muttered. “It’d be rude not to.” 

_ Pretend to eat the cake _ , said Myrddin.  _ And try to tell your father as well _ . 

“I can’t tell my father that the sorcerer in my head told him not to eat the cake,” whispered Arthur. 

_ You can think of something _ , said Myrddin.  _ If not, your father may die _ . 

“I don’t believe you,” murmured Arthur. “I think you want to disrupt the peace treaty with King Custennin.” 

_ You can think whatever you want _ , said Myrddin.  _ Just don’t eat the cake _ .  _ Pretend to take bites and drop it on the floor when no one is looking.  _

“That plan is ridiculous,” said Arthur. He must have spoken too loudly because Princess Olwen leaned in close. 

“What did you say, my dearest prince?” asked Princess Olwen. She fluttered her eyelashes aggressively at him. 

“Er...That cake looks ridiculously delicious,” smiled Arthur. Princess Olwen smiled back and ran her hand down Arthur’s arm. Arthur tried to subtly scoot his chair a little further away from the princess. 

_ Get your servant to help _ , said Myrddin. 

“Merlin?” whispered Arthur. 

_ He is much more than you give him credit for. He would be willing to help. Remember when he drank that poisoned chalice?  _

“I’m not making him eat the cake,” muttered Arthur. 

_ No, you idiot _ , Myrddin sighed.  _ Just signal him for more wine and when he comes by slip the cake to him _ . 

“What if he eats it?” asked Arthur. 

_ He’s much more intelligent than you _ , replied Myrddin dryly.  _ He won’t eat the cake _ . Arthur scoffed. Myrddin didn’t know Merlin.

King Custennin had finished cutting up the cake and was now distributing it around the table. 

Arthur cut up his cake and pretended to eat. “This is delicious, Princess Olwen.” He looked around for Merlin, but to his surprise found Merlin already next to him blocking Princess Olwen’s view. 

“More wine, sire?” asked Merlin. 

“Certainly,” said Arthur. He tried to give Merlin a significant look, but Merlin just looked confused. 

“Are you alright, Arthur?” Merlin whispered into his ear. 

“I’m fine, Merlin,” said Arthur and gave Merlin a significant eyebrow wiggle. 

Merlin looked even more confused and shrugged. “Let me know if you need more wine, sire.” 

Merlin walked away and Arthur glared in Merlin’s direction. The idiot didn’t get it!

_ Look at your plate, Arthur _ , came Myrddin’s voice and Arthur noticed that half of his cake was gone. 

“You really like the cake!” explained Princess Olwen. 

“How could I not?” smiled Arthur. “It was delicious!” 

Princess Olwen gave a simpering giggle and smiled. Arthur nodded at her and gulped down the wine in his cup. 

“Merlin!” called Arthur. 

“Yes, sire?” asked Merlin, moving in between Arthur and Princess Olwen once more. 

“I would like some more wine, Merlin.” 

“You know, you shouldn’t drink so much wine, sire,” scolded Merlin.

“It goes deliciously with the cake,” said Arthur wiggling his eyebrows at Merlin. 

“Yes, but I’m afraid you have eaten all your cake, sire,” said Merlin looking at the plate. 

“Ah?” asked Arthur. “So I have.” He grinned at Merlin. 

_ Told you it would work _ , Myrddin’s smug voice rang in his mind. 

“Good, sire,” said Merlin and moved away. 

“You shouldn’t let him talk to you like that,” said Princess Olwen. 

“Who? Merlin?” asked Arthur. 

“He’s rather insubordinate, is he not?” 

“I’ll punish him tomorrow,” said Arthur privately thinking that he’d do nothing of the sort. 

“Of course,” said Princess Olwen. She was about to lean in to say something else, when there was a commotion at the head of the table. 

King Custennin had started to grow. Soon his weight became too much for the chair and the chair splintered beneath him. The King stood up with a roar.

Princess Olwen fainted besides Arthur. Arthur leaned over to revive her, but when he touched her, her eyes opened wide. 

“Prince Arthur, I’m so sorry,” Princess Olwen apologized quickly, her dark brown eyes wide and clear of the cloudy film Arthur had puzzled at earlier. Princess Olwen gestured at the head of the table. “That’s not my father--- it is the giant, Ysbaddaden! He wants to take over my father’s kingdom.” 

“Guards!” called Arthur and he looked desperately around for a sword. 

Ysbaddaden roared and swiped at the table, sending men flying. He took a step and the hall shook with his weight. 

“You shall pay, you insolent girl,” Ysbaddaden bellowed, moving towards Princess Olwen. 

“I have promised myself to Prince Culhwch and I’d die before I break that promise,” Princess Olwen yelled, holding herself completely different from the princess Arthur had seen previously in Camelot. Princess Olwen stood proud and tall; her face was not meekly nor seductive, but was strong and bold. When the giant roared at her, she stood her ground and glared at the giant. 

Arthur grabbed a sword from the wall and ran to protect Princess Olwen, but got shoved out of the way by Merlin. The giant somehow tripped and fell straight on Merlin. 

“Merlin!” cried Arthur and ran towards the giant with a sword and swung the sword into the giant’s neck. He pulled the sword out of the giant and was about to swing the sword again, when he realized the giant was still, very very still. 

Arthur quickly dropped the sword and began to try to push the giant. “Help me!” he called to his knights. To his surprise, the first person to join him was Princess Olwen. With the help of the knights and Princess Olwen, they managed to push the giant over on his side. 

“Merlin!” Arthur knelt beside Merlin. “Someone go get Gaius!” 

Arthur carefully moved Merlin’s neckerchief and put his finger on Merlin’s neck. He breathed a sigh of relief when he felt a quick, but light pulse under him. Arthur stroked Merlin’s hair back from his face and worried. Merlin was so fragile and yet he always insisted on throwing himself into harm's way. Merlin had delicate features and such a skinny little body, Arthur couldn’t help but to feel protective over him. Arthur lightly ran his fingers down Merlin’s face, feeling reassured that he was still warm and alive. 

Gaius rushed in and checked for injuries along Merlin’s back. He probed Merlin’s head with his fingers, lifted up Merlin’s eyelids and then sat back and sighed. 

“I’m worried about Merlin’s spine,” said Gaius. “We’ll have to move him away from this area, but we will have to do so carefully. One wrong jostle, and Merlin could lose the ability to walk.”

“Take him to my chambers,” Arthur ordered. “They are much closer than his room.”

Arthur helped Gaius carefully move Merlin onto a stretcher before carrying Merlin down the corridor to his room. They gently transferred Merlin down on Arthur’s large comfortable bed and Arthur gave a quiet sigh of relief. Arthur worriedly paced besides the bed as Gaius carefully examined Merlin, applying bandages of white cotton that soon soaked with red. After a long while, Gaius sighed and stood up. 

“How is he?” asked Arthur urgently. 

“He will live, but he needs some time to heal. He appears to have a few broken ribs and a large laceration to his side. I will need someone to apply this balm of arnica to his ribs and calendula oil to the laceration so I can collect the herbs necessary for the potions for his head wound and blood loss as quickly as possible.” 

“I can help,” said Arthur. “I can send a team of my men with you to find the herbs, while I apply the balm and the oil.” 

Gaius nodded. “Thank you, Sire. Merlin should be fine for the next couple of hours.” 

After calling a team of knights to accompany Gaius, Arthur sat on the bed besides Merlin. Merlin looked far too pale next to Arthur’s red blanket. Arthur dipped his hand in the balm of arnica and began to gently rub it into Merlin’s ribs. Merlin’s skin was soft and white, but Arthur was concerned about a few scars dotting Merlin’s torso. A fierce protectiveness rose in Arthur, surprising himself. He never thought that he would feel this strongly about his servant, but in that moment Arthur was certain that he would die for Merlin. 

Merlin teased Arthur to no end and spoke his mind far more than he should as a servant. Yet, Merlin was loyal; not to the future king of Camelot, but to Arthur himself. There was no other that regarded Arthur in that sense. 

Arthur watched as Merlin’s thin chest rose and fell with his steady breaths. He drizzled the oil over Merlin’s dressings and rubbed his hand soothingly into Merlin’s side. Merlin’s breaths deepened and his face relaxed, as if he was comforted by Arthur’s touch. Arthur leaned forward and studied Merlin’s face. Then, Arthur leaned down and pressed a kiss onto Merlin’s sweaty forehead. 

Arthur heard a noise in the doorway and saw Princess Olwen standing with a small smile on her face. 

“I can come back if this is a bad time,” she said. 

Arthur blushed fiercely and cleared his throat. He didn’t know what had overcome him to kiss his manservant in such a tender way. “This is fine.” 

Princess Olwen bowed gracefully with none of her previous shyness or overt flirtations present in her movements. “Thank you, Prince Arthur. I will be brief.” 

Arthur nodded. “Go on, Princess Olwen.” 

“I wanted to apologize for bringing such chaos to your court and your kingdom,” Princess Olwen heaved a great sigh. “ Ysbaddaden the giant has been terrorizing my kingdom for years. Then, a sorcerer came forth with the prophecy that after I fell in love, Ysbaddaden would die.”

“I take it that Ysbaddaden did everything in his power to prevent you from falling in love, then,” said Arthur.

“That is unfortunately correct. To stop the prophecy, Ysbaddaden, the giant imprisoned my father, and used his magic to impersonate him. He also bewitched me to keep me from rebelling against him and arranged my marriage to you with King Uther. Ysbaddaden thought that if I married you, I would not fall in love and the prophecy would never be fulfilled.” Princess Olwen blushed and looked down at the floor before meeting Arthur’s eyes. “However, unbeknownst to him, I had already promised myself to a young prince called  Culhwch.”

“I am grateful that  Ysbaddaden is finally laid to rest and you can marry Prince Culhwch,” said Arthur. “Ysbaddaden’s actions are his fault, not yours. If you wish, Camelot will remain an ally to your kingdom.” 

Princess Olwen bowed her head. “That is very great news, indeed. I was worried about informing you that I would not be able to marry you. Some men don’t take that too well, so I was relieved that you, too, love another.” She nodded her head to the back of the room. 

“I would never force a woman to marry me against her will,” said Arthur. “And I respect that promises made under the hold of a spell are not binding.” 

“Thank you, Prince Arthur,” smiled Princess Olwen. “Camelot will gain much from your leadership.” 

“It was my privilege to meet you,” said Arthur, giving Princess Olwen a bow. 

“I’ll leave you to tend your loved one,” Princess Olwen had a soft smile on her face. “I understand it is hard to marry for love and not for the good of your kingdom, but for your sake Arthur, I hope you get to do the former. You, of all people, deserve it.” 

Arthur frowned and then gaped when he realized what Princess Olwen was hinting at. “Er, no, no, no. I’m afraid you’ve gotten it all wrong. Merlin isn’t my lover.” Arthur let out a slightly hysterical laugh. “Merlin is my servant.” 

“I understand.” Princess Olwen winked at Arthur. “Your secret is safe with me.” 

Arthur blushed fiercely as Princess Olwen walked out the door. “Merlin isn’t my loved one,” he muttered to himself. 

_ Idiot _ , murmured Myrddin. Arthur jumped. He had completely forgotten about the old sorcerer living in his head. 

“Do you know if Merlin will be alright?” asked Arthur. 

_ He’ll be fine _ , Myrddin responded.  _ He’ll be even better if you keep rubbing arnica onto his ribs like Gaius told you to _ . 

“That’s what I was doing before Princess Olwen came in,” protested Arthur. 

_ No, you weren’t _ . Myrddin sounded exasperated.  _ You were stroking him and kissing his face _ .

“I was not!” exclaimed Arthur indignantly. 

_ You were too, you great big idiot _ .

“Merlin almost died,” said Arthur. “I don’t know if you care for servants, but Merlin is also my friend. I was very concerned for my friend.”

_ Would you do that to any other friend? _ Myrddin sounded smug.  _ I think not. _

“You are taking this out of proportion,” Arthur replied hotly. “I was expressing my care. I never want to take advantage of him.” 

_ You weren’t taking advantage of him, don’t worry _ , assured Myrddin.  _ It was all very virginal and innocent. But I think he’d like you to do that when he is awake instead _ . 

Arthur opened his mouth to give an outraged reply, but Gaius burst through the door. 

“How is he, sire?” asked Gaius slightly out of breath and sweaty.

“He is doing well,” said Arthur. “I did everything that you requested me to do.” 

_ And more _ , smirked Myrddin. 

“Excellent,” said Gaius. He rested his hand on Merlin’s forehead. “I knew I could count on you. Merlin seems to be doing much better. I have collected all the herbs I need and will have the concoctions ready by dawn at the earliest.” 

“Take care of yourself, Gaius,” Arthur said. “Is there any way I can help?” 

“If Merlin could remain here for the night, that would be best for him,” said Gaius. “I am afraid that moving him may slow his healing.” 

“Of course,” said Arthur. “Merlin is welcome to stay here and heal. Do you need anyone to help make the concoctions?” 

Gaius shook his head. “No, sire. No one else has the skill to help me but Merlin.” 

Arthur nodded. “I’ll stay here and keep an eye on him.” 

“Thank you, sire,” said Gaius. “I appreciate your concern for Merlin.”

“Of course, Gaius.” 

Gaius turned to leave, but hesitated by the door. “You can sleep, Arthur. Merlin is strong and will make it through the night. He doesn’t need someone to watch him all night. It would help me best if you were awake and alert to assist me tomorrow.” 

“Of course,” said Arthur. 

After Gaius left, Arthur changed into his bedclothes. “I can do this by myself, believe it or not,” he told the sleeping Merlin. 

Myrddin sniggered a bit, but didn’t say anything. 

“Where should I sleep?” asked Arthur. “Merlin is in the bed.” 

_ Your bed is big enough to fit three comfortably. Merlin doesn’t take up that much space _ . _Just don't crush him in your sleep_. 

Arthur slipped into bed besides Merlin and tried to fall asleep. However, he was so conscious of Merlin laying in the bed next to him, he couldn’t fall asleep. His body was awake and alert from the nerves of the day. 

After tossing and turning for a good amount of time, Myrddin sighed.  _ Arthur, go and take a walk. You need to calm down so you can sleep _ . 

“Says the person who invaded my dreams and didn’t let me sleep well for weeks,” grumbled Arthur. 

_ That was a mistake _ , said Myrddin.  _ I didn’t know that you’d be so affected by them. _

Arthur frowned and looked over at Merlin. “Will he be okay on his own?” Merlin looked so soft in the moonlight. Arthur felt a strange sort of squeeze in his heart at seeing Merlin in his bed. 

_ He’ll be fine _ , Myrddin promised.  _ You heard Gaius. You’re more helpful if you are awake tomorrow. Go and wear yourself out so you can sleep _ .

Arthur tore himself away from the warm bed besides Merlin and opened the door to his room. He walked past the night guards feeling the cold stone of the castle seep into his feet. He turned the corner when he saw familiar brown curls at the end of the hallway. 

“Morgana?” called Arthur. Morgana turned around, her face pale in the moonlight. An image from one of Arthur’s dreams of Morgana with messy hair and a crazed look in her eyes taking the crown from his father flashes in Arthur’s mind. 

“Arthur?” said Morgana and the sight of her concerned face wipes the image from his eyes. “What are you doing up this late?” 

“I, er, couldn’t sleep,” said Arthur. “Today was…” He trailed off, unsure what to say. 

“I understand,” replied Morgana. “It was a bit terrifying. Is Merlin alright?” 

Arthur nodded. “Gaius is working on the medicine as we speak.” 

“That’s a relief,” sighed Morgana. “I can’t get the image of the giant falling on him out of my mind.” 

Arthur shuddered. The image haunted him as well. “What are you doing awake?” asked Arthur. 

“You know I have problems sleeping,” said Morgana. 

“I thought Gaius gave you sleeping draughts for that?” asked Arthur. “Gaius gave me one and it knocked me right out.” 

“The sleeping draughts don’t help anymore,” sighed Morgana. “I’ve been having these terrible nightmares…” 

“Oh really?” asked Arthur. “What about?” 

Morgana shook her head. “I’d rather not say.” 

“If it is weighing that heavily on your mind, I’d be happy to shoulder some of the weight,” replied Arthur. “I’ve had my share of nightmares as well.” 

Morgana gave Arthur a small quiet smile. “You are normally such an oaf, but you can be quite sweet sometimes.” 

Arthur frowned and scratched his head. “An oaf?” 

“An oaf,” confirmed Morgana with a larger smile. “I did say that you could be sweet as well.” She was beginning to look more like herself. 

“Well, thank you for that vote of confidence,” said Arthur. “If I am going to be further insulted, I may as well head back to bed.” Arthur nudged her with his arm to show that he was joking. 

Morgana nudged Arthur back. “You should go. You need to sleep, Arthur. Tomorrow is likely to be a long day.” 

“You haven’t really told me much. Are you sure there is nothing I can do?” asked Arthur. “I can go get Guinevere if you’d rather talk to her.” 

“Oh no, I don’t want to wake her up,” said Morgana. “She does enough already.” 

“Alright,” said Arthur. “Well, if you don’t want to tell me that’s fine. But I’ve already seen you at your worst. Remember when you tried seducing that poor visiting knight? I don’t think there is anything you can do that will change my perspective of you.”

Inside Arthur’s head, Myrddin shifted slightly as if he was uncomfortable. 

“There are still things you don’t know about me,” Morganna sighed. 

“I can’t help you if I don’t know them,” said Arthur. Morgana tilted her head and studied him thoughtfully.

“Will you promise not to tell anyone about this?” asked Morgana softly. Morgana was always so powerful and defiant, but now she looked sad, soft, and scared.

“I promise,” said Arthur, taking her hand. “You are family. I will protect you. How bad are these dreams anyway?” 

Morgana took a deep breath and squeezed Arthur’s hand. “I dreamed what happened today.”

“What?” asked Arthur. “Like the whole giant impersonating King Custinnen?” 

“Yes,” said Morgana. “And it’s happened before. My dreams lately-- they’ve been coming true. Not all of them come true, but most of them do. Gaius always tells me not to think about it, but I’m afraid it might be magic. I’m afraid  _ I _ might be magic.”

The Evil Morgana from his dreams came to mind. Her disheveled hair swirled as her magic shifted the air around her. Her mouth was a thin grim line and her eyes were filled with pain. 

Arthur wanted to retract his hand from Morgana’s grasp. All he could think of was that magic had caused the injuries to Merlin, but the words of Myrddin seemed to echo inside of him:  _ Open your heart _ . 

The image of Evil Morgana faded from his head as he looked at the Morgana in front of him. Her hair was in order, her mouth was soft, and her eyes were kind. He hoped with all his being, that Morgana would never feel the kind of pain and distrust that the Evil Morgana had in her eyes. 

“We’ll figure it out, Morgana,” promised Arthur. “Whatever it is, we’ll figure it out. Even if you are magic, it’ll be okay.” 

Morgana looked down and Arthur was surprised to see her composing herself as a tear ran down her cheek.

“I may have misjudged you all of these years,” Morgana said thoughtfully. “Thank you, Arthur.” 

Morgana gave him a quick hug and Arthur felt the tension in her shoulders relax. 

“Try to get some more sleep, Morgana,” said Arthur. 

“You too, Arthur,” she smiled at him and walked away down the dark corridor. “Look after Merlin for me.” 

_ Very good, Arthur _ , Myrddin’s voice was clear within Arthur’s head. For some reason, Arthur was suddenly reminded of the curse from Anhora for killing the unicorn. 

“Is this a test?” asked Arthur. “To see if I’m worthy of being king?”

_You were always worthy of being king, Arthur_ , replied Myrddin. _Your heart is pure and you have the best of intentions in mind._ _I’m just helping you with your kingdom_.

“Just yesterday, you said I was a turd,” complained Arthur. 

_ You are a turd _ , came the reply.  _ A princely turd with a heart of gold _ . 

“Shut up,” said Arthur but he smiled feeling more relaxed than he had in the past six hours. 

_ Go to sleep, Arthur. You need it and Merlin will need you _ .  _ And you definitely need Merlin. _

Arthur obediently walked back to his room, slid underneath the blanket besides Merlin’s body and fell into a deep dreamless sleep. 

*** 

Arthur woke to find Gaius studying at Merlin who was still in the bed besides him. Arthur blushed, but quickly got over himself after he saw the serious expression on Gaius’s face. 

“Is he alright?” asked Arthur shooting up in bed. “Is Merlin alright?” 

“He is healing,” responded Gaius. “I am worried that he has not awoken yet. If he does not wake, I may have trouble getting him to take his medicine.: 

Arthur frowned. “Is there any other way you can get him to take it?” 

Gaius shook his head mournfully. “I can’t risk him choking on the medicine.” Arthur would have probably stayed pacing his room all day if a servant hadn’t knocked on his door. 

“King Uther requests your presence, sire,” the servant said respectfully. “I am here to help you dress when your manservant is healing.”

“Thank you,” said Arthur. “There is no need for your help. I will be on my way shortly.” 

Arthur dressed himself with only a few mishaps and met his father. King Uther was surrounded by his advisors. 

“Good, you’re here,” said King Uther. “We need to discuss what to do about Princess Olwen.” 

“I talked to her last night,” said Arthur. “I think it is best to let her marry her promised one. If we do so, that will make an ally out of her and her kingdom.” 

“Do you think that we should let her crimes go unpunished?” asked King Uther. 

“Crimes?” Arthur was confused. “What crimes?” 

“The crime of magic,” said King Uther. “She knows that magic is forbidden in Camelot.”

“But she didn’t use magic,” protested Arthur. “She was the one under a spell.” 

“We can’t be certain,” said King Uther. “We need to think carefully about this.”

“I don’t understand what there is to ponder,” argued Arthur. “We let her go back to her kingdom. She was a victim, father.” 

“We can’t be certain,” repeated King Uther. He wiped his forehead with a shaking hand and Arthur drew closer. 

“Are you alright, father?” 

King Uther nodded, but on closer inspection, King Uther looked grey and sweaty. There were deep bags underneath his eyes and his cheeks looked sunken.

_ The cake! _ Myrddin was suddenly very agitated.  _ Ask him if he ate the cake _ . 

Arthur could have slapped himself. In the chaos of last night, he forgot all about Myrddin’s claim that the cake was poisoned. 

“Did you have some cake last night, father?” Arthur asked. “If so, I am afraid that it may make you ill as it was brought by the giant.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous. I feel fine,” insisted King Uther, wiping a river of sweat off his brow. 

“I can go fetch Gaius to be certain,” suggested Arthur. 

“No, I insist that I am well,” said King Uther. 

“Very well, father,” Arthur replied. 

King Uther nodded just once and then leaned over to vomit a bright green substance all over the floor. 

_ Go, quickly _ , Myrddin urged, but Arthur was already sprinting towards his chambers. 

“Gaius, Gaius,” Arthur panted as he entered the chamber. “My father.. He is unwell. I can help with Merlin.” 

“Please give Merlin the rest of this brew,” said Gaius. “One spoonful every ten minutes. He needs a spoonful in about a minute.” Gaius shoved the brew into Arthur's hands and rushed off. 

Arthur moved closer to the bed to see Merlin gazing sleepily at him. “You’re awake,” said Arthur feeling something in his chest loosen. 

“Observant of you to notice,” Merlin whispered and the corner of his mouth twitched in a half smile. 

“Don’t talk,” Arthur ordered. “You are still healing. I am going to give you a spoonful of this medicine and then I will find someone to look after you, while I help Gaius with my father.”

“Tastes gross,” Merlin murmured. 

“You liked the taste of my buna brew,” said Arthur. “I think you can handle a spoonful of this.” 

Arthur poured out a spoonful of medicine and held it in front of Merlin’s lips. As Merlin closed his lips around the spoon, grimaced and then pulled back to smile sleepily at Arthur, Arthur felt the same fierce protectiveness rise in him that he had felt last night. Merlin was so delicate that it worried Arthur.

Arthur watched Merlin’s eyes flutter closed. He got up and ran into the hallway to fetch a servant, almost running straight into Gwen. 

“Gwen!” Arthur said urgently. “Will you help me? My father’s ill but someone needs to give Merlin a spoonful of this medicine every ten minutes.” 

“Certainly,” said Gwen grabbing the medicine bottle from Arthur’s hands. “I’ve got it covered, Arthur.”

“Thanks Gwen,” Arthur gave her a brief smile and then hurried off to go find Gaius and his father. 

***

As Merlin got better, Uther slowly became weaker. 

Before long, Gaius had ordered Uther to bed rest. Arthur became worried when Uther was too sick to argue against it. 

Surprisingly, Arthur’s only solace was having Merlin near him every night. Merlin was still recovering and hadn’t yet left Arthur’s bed for long stretches of time. Arthur found Merlin's presence comforting. After a long day, he liked coming back to listen to Merlin's comments and funny little anecdotes. At night, listening to Merlin's quiet breathing soothed Arthur to sleep. 

Arthur should really have sent Merlin back to Gaius’s chambers long ago, but Arthur’s chambers were much better heated than the room Merlin normally lived in. Also, Gaius was worried about how moving Merlin would affect his back. Arthur didn’t think he could stand losing both his father and Merlin. 

Under the care of Gwen and occasionally Morgana, Merlin slowly became well enough to walk up and down Arthur’s room. 

When he wasn’t with Merlin, Arthur was busy running the kingdom on his father’s behalf and standing vigil besides his father’s bed. Morgana was a great help during these times. She helped Gaius look after King Uther and took on tasks without even asking Arthur. Arthur was forever grateful for her presence. 

As Merlin grew stronger, he grew more concerned for Arthur. Arthur could sometimes see the worry hidden in Merlin’s eyes even as he laughed and teased Arthur. In the chaos of King Uther’s illness, Merlin stayed in Arthur’s room without question. To Arthur, it made sense because Gaius spent most nights in the room next to the King’s and someone needed to help take care of Merlin. Arthur became accustomed to seeing Merlin’s clothes in his closet and Merlin’s sleepy smile before bed. It is a comfortable domesticity that seems almost natural to Arthur. The cheerful company of Merlin healing next to him gives Arthur strength to deal with the pain and stress of losing his father and taking upon the duties of a king. 

One terrible day, when King Uther seemed close to death, Merlin came and put his arm around Arthur’s shoulder’s. 

“I know you hate magic, Arthur,” said Merlin. “But maybe magic would help reverse whatever the giant did to Uther.” 

“Magic is outlawed, Merlin.” Arthur shook his head.. “Where would I find a sorcerer in Camelot?” Besides the one living inside his head, Arthur privately added. 

Merlin hesitated. “Well, there is one old man that lives in a hut in the forest. Some call him Emrys and say he is a sorcerer.” 

“The forest is a rather large area to cover,” said Arthur. “How would I find the sorcerer?”

“I could take you,” Merlin offered. 

_ No _ , Myrddin responded instantly. _ He is too weak. He means well, but in the state he is in, it would kill him and that wouldn’t do any good to anyone _ . 

“That is not an option, Merlin,” said Arthur firmly. “You can barely walk the length of my room!” 

“I wouldn’t need to walk,” argued Merlin. “I could ride upon a horse.” 

_ He’s an idiot _ , Myrddin interjected.  _ Don’t listen to him _ . 

“No, Merlin,” said Arthur. “Don’t be an idiot.” He brushed the top of Merlin’s head fondly with his hand and left to go to another council meeting. 

When he was outside in the corridor, Arthur whispered angrily. “Do you really think that I was going to let him go out in the forest? I don’t need you to lecture me about Merlin. I already know he is a well meaning idiot.” 

_ You should send Gwen to keep an eye on him _ , said Myrddin.  _ To make sure he doesn’t do something stupid _ . 

“Hmph,” said Arthur annoyed. Nevertheless, he had a servant fetch Gwen to keep an eye on Merlin. Just in case. 

***

King Uther died on a Tuesday and Arthur was crowned king on Wednesday. That night he got back to his room to see Merlin silently slipping out. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” asked Arthur. 

“Back to my chambers,” said Merlin. “I’ve overtaken your hospitality long enough.”

“No, I didn’t mind at all,” said Arthur. Arthur rather enjoyed having Merlin to talk to at night. The one thing that got him yesterday and today was the thought of Merlin's steady presence at his side. 

_ There are chambers for the Prince’s manservant adjacent to your room _ , Myrddin suggested.  _ Merlin still isn’t quite aware how much he means to you _ . 

“You are welcome to the chambers next to me,” said Arthur. “That’s where the prince’s manservant is meant to sleep. If he wishes.” 

“Thank you for the offer, Arthur,” said Merlin. 

Merlin turned to leave, but Arthur grabbed his hand. 

“Tonight, just tonight. Would you mind staying with me?” 

Merlin nodded and they slipped into bed together. 

Arthur suddenly felt embarrassed. “I don’t want to pressure you into staying in my room with me. You are free to leave at any time.” 

“I’m not being pressured, Arthur,” said Merlin. “Your bed is much more comfortable than my bed and your chambers are much warmer.”

“Good,” said Arthur. “Good.” 

“I just thought that I had overstayed my welcome.” 

“What made you think that?” Arthur rolled on his side to look at Merlin. 

“There has been talk.” Merlin swallowed and Arthur watched his throat bob with the movement. “Gossip that I was doing more than just healing in your bed while the king was dying.” 

“Have you come to any harm?” asked Arthur with concern. 

“No.” Merlin turned to look at Arthur. “I am fine. I don’t want to reflect badly on you. Especially now that you are king.” 

“I am not worried about that.” Arthur felt such a fondness for Merlin. “I have bigger things to worry about than a bit of gossip. Surprisingly, your presence has been helpful.” 

“I’m glad to hear that,” Merlin gave Arthur a small smile. “Although, I must request to sleep in the servants chambers from now on. I’ve been resting, but I need to go back to my duties.”

Arthur felt his stomach drop unpleasantly, but nodded. “Of course, Merlin.” 

Arthur laid the darkness and listened to the steady sounds of Merlin’s breath. Arthur felt some sort of sadness, but he couldn’t quite identify it. It was not the harsh darkness of losing his father, but it was a quiet sort of mourning. 

_ Merlin cares deeply for you _ , Myrddin said.  _ He merely wants what is best for you. _

“Weren’t you supposed to leave when I became King?” asked Arthur. 

_ I thought I would _ , said Myrddin.  _ Apparently, there is still more to be done. You certainly have a lot to learn and many people to meet _ .

“So I’m stuck with you?” Arthur said. 

_ It appears so _ . Myrddin responded. _ And I, with you. Now sleep, Arthur. Tomorrow is your first day of being king _ .

Arthur opened his mouth to say that he wasn’t sleepy, but a wave of gentle golden slumber hit him and he fell asleep.


	2. The Quest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to avoid any confusion, in this universe, Arthur has not met Gwaine, Lancelot, Percival or Elyan yet. However, Merlin is familiar with Gwaine and Lancelot.

Arthur spent his first year of being King waiting for something to go wrong. To his cautious surprise, the harvests were good, the people were pleased with his performance, and his knights were working harder than ever to keep Camelot safe. 

Though Arthur did not feel ready to be king, he was helped by an unexpected advisor: Myrddin. Myrddin remained inside his head--- and while the majority of his comments were snarky--- a good amount of his interjections had a certain amount of wisdom to them. Myrddin had a great deal of good knowledge to offer about everything from diplomacy to druids. Arthur was first distrustful of Myrddin’s advise, but when he began to implement the suggestions in his daily regime as king, he was subsequently praised for having insight and wisdom beyond his young age. 

Morgana was another surprising source of support. Though Morgana held great disregard for homemaking duties female royals normally held, she was an excellent strategist with an acute actuarial mind. Her passion for the common people in combination with her mathematical prowess led to a number of revisions in the tax codes, leaving Camelot’s citizens with less taxes and more governmental support. 

And then there was Merlin. 

Merlin brought Arthur’s breakfast late nearly every other day of the week, bounding in with a guilty smile well after the sun had risen. Arthur always meant to chastise Merlin’s tardiness, but would be drawn into a conversation about something incredibly idiotic. Arthur would have to argue, all the while watching Merlin’s wide blue eyes twinkle and his long (yet strangely enticing) limbs flail about. By the time Arthur had stopped thinking about the words that came out of Merlin’s (soft pink) mouth, he had completely forgotten that Merlin was late. 

Far from contributing to Arthur’s serious matters of state, Merlin was (more often than not) very distracting. At dinnertime meals, Merlin would mutter jokes to Arthur as he served him. If someone said something rather stupid, Merlin sniggered just loudly enough for Arthur to hear. Merlin also had a habit of licking his lips during very important meetings with visiting guests and Arthur would be so annoyed at Merlin’s odd habit that he would have to watch Merlin’s pink little tongue dart out and around his mouth. And at night, instead of brooding about important matters of state, he instead laughed at Merlin’s characterizations of the visiting guests and smiled himself to sleep thinking about how Merlin was the most useless servant ever. 

Though a terrible servant, Merlin did help the days go by faster. Before Arthur knew it, the first anniversary of his inauguration as king approached. Far from being happy, Arthur grew more and more nervous as time went on. His father had once told him that good luck doesn’t hold, and so Arthur anxiously bided his time before his good luck failed and disaster struck Camelot once more. 

Therefore, Arthur was almost relieved when, eleven months into his reign, Morgana ran into his room in the morning as Merlin was getting him dressed. 

“Arthur!” yelled Morgana in distress. “Arthur!” 

“Ahhh!” screamed Arthur trapped in his tunic. 

Myrddin snickered in the back of his mind.  _ You get trapped nearly every morning. _

“Sorry, Arthur, I didn’t realize--” Morgana started.

“It’s okay, Morgana,” Merlin soothed. “He does this nearly every morning.” Merlin pulled Arthur’s head through his tunic. 

“I do not,” protested Arthur. With Arthur’s head finally free of the red tunic, Arthur could now see Morgana’s wet cheeks, red eyes and mussed hair. 

“What is the matter, Morgana?” Arthur led Morgana to a chair and helped her sit. “Are you alright?” 

“I had a nightmare.” Morgana’s words were as shaky as the hand she put on her chest. “A terrible one.” 

Arthur half expected Merlin to laugh, like he did for every silly thing, but Merlin’s brow furrowed in concern.

“What was it about, Morgana?” Merlin’s voice was gentle and his smile was kind. He pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to Morgana. 

“Something terrible is coming.” Morgana wiped an unshed tear from under her eye. “A king...A king with green eyes. He wants to destroy Camelot.” 

Arthur frowned. Arthur couldn’t be sure, but he strongly suspected that Morgana’s dreams were magic. Despite a mostly helpful sorcerer living in his head, Arthur couldn’t quite shake the instinct to distrust magic. 

_ You should listen to her _ , Myrddin urged.  _ She’s been right before. It doesn’t hurt to be cautious, and she’ll have better regard for you if you treat her seriously. She doesn’t want to admit it, but she is scared. _

An image of the disheveled angry Evil Morgana of his dreams flashed through Arthur’s mind. If magic could corrupt Morgana of all people, should he act upon her magic? Would acknowledging her magical dreams make her worse? Would this be the downfall of Camelot? 

“Arthur.” Merlin gave him a disapproving blue gaze. The unease in Arthur’s stomach loosened. He knew what to do. 

“Thank you, Morgana, for that information,” Arthur put what he hoped was a comforting hand on Morgana’s shoulder. “I will increase the guard around the castle. I will tell everyone to be on the lookout for anything suspicious.” 

“Thank you, Arthur,” breathed Morgana. “I appreciate your humoring me.” She smiled sadly at Arthur.

“I want this kingdom to be safe, Morgana.” Arthur patted Morgana’s shoulder awkwardly. He was rubbish at comforting people. “And it is also my duty to look after your wellbeing as well. This includes ensuring you feel safe in Camelot’s walls.” 

“You’ve changed, Arthur.” Morgana scrutinized Arthur’s face and nodded. “Great gods, Arthur. You may be finally becoming a man.” With that, she gathered up her nightgown and swept out of the room.

Arthur’s mouth fell open. “What does she mean, I’m finally becoming a man?” Arthur sputtered. He turned to Merlin. “What was I before?”

“A great big prat,” Merlin teased with a grin. 

Arthur threw a pillow at him. “Take that back.”

Merlin dodged the pillow. “Fine! I take it back.” Merlin picked up the pillow and wacked Arthur. “You’re still a prat.” 

“Get out before I have you clean the stables,” ordered Arthur. “And think for a bit how you should be talking to your king.” 

Merlin giggled loudly as he left the room. A younger Arthur may have been furious, but now Arthur couldn’t keep the smile from his face. 

Arthur increased the guard around the castle, giving vague reasons for why he wished to do so. He followed Myrddin’s suggestion and increased guard around Morgana’s room as well and Morgana gave him a subtle nod of thanks at dinner. 

Arthur went to bed relatively satisfied that the problem had been dwelt with. However, the next day, Arthur was awoken by a loud banging on his door. 

“Arthur!” called Morgana. “Are you decent?” 

“Come in, Morgana.” Arthur quickly threw on a robe and opened the door to a frantic Morgana. 

“It’s Gwen. They took Gwen.” Morgana’s face was white and her hands were trembling. 

“What?” Arthur gently guided Morgana into his room and sat her down. “How do you know?” 

“They left a note.” Morgana thrust a sealed scroll into Arthur’s hands. “Oh, it’s all my fault.” 

“The kingdom of Gorre demands 5000 pounds of gold. If we fail to receive this within the next month, then Queen Morgana will be killed. Every rescue attempt will result in the Queen losing a limb.” The note was simply signed, King Maleagant. 

“This must be the king, Arthur.” Morgana jumped up from the chair and nervously began to pace the room. “The king from my dreams.”

“I don’t understand. Morgana, you are right here in front of me. Why would they take Gwen?”

“I was stressed last night, so Gwen and I were trying on my dresses. She looked really good in a maroon one of mine, so I gifted it to her. The kidnappers must have seen her in the dress and assumed she was me!” 

“And why do they call you Queen Morgana? There is no queen of Camelot.” Arthur was entirely befuddled. “At least, not yet.” 

“We need to rescue Gwen,” cried Morgana ignoring Arthur’s questions. “I know she’s a commoner, but she’s not just a serving girl-- she’s my friend.” Morgana stopped pacing, turned to Arthur and took a deep breath as if to shout, but instead let it go in a long shaky exhale.

“Let’s take some time to think about this, Morgana,” mused Arthur and now he began to pace the room. “There is certainly the issue of perception. We do have to think about what the noblemen would think about using our resources for a servant girl.”

“If you lack the balls to do so, then I will do so myself.” Arthur turned abruptly to Morgana, startled by her crassness. Morgana’s eyes were wide and anguished, but Arthur saw that they were still kind, unlike the Morgana from his dreams. “Gwen’s life is at stake! Who gives a damn about what the noblemen think?”

“Morgana--” Arthur started to speak to defend his manhood, but was interrupted by Merlin sliding into his chambers, red-faced and sweaty.

“Morgana, I thought I heard your voice,” Merlin took in large gulps of air and rested his hands on his knees. “Are you alright?” 

“They took Gwen, Merlin,” Morgana grabbed the scroll from Arthur and shoved it at Merlin. “Arthur doesn’t care. He said that we need to think about what the noblemen would say about risking their lives for a serving girl, so I will be planning a search party  _ by myself _ .” 

“You’re misinterpreting my words,” Arthur said. “You-”

Merlin cut Arthur off. “We need to help Gwen before they realize they didn’t actually take Morgana! Arthur, do you not care about Gwen?” Arthur wasn’t previously aware that Merlin’s face could contort into such a look of disapproval.

“I never said I don’t care about Gwen,” protested Arthur. Being cornered by perhaps the only two people who had no qualms about telling him off seemed to make him very sweaty. “I care about Gwen!” 

“Then why aren’t you helping us find her?” asked Morgana. 

“Who is the king here?” asked Arthur. “I need to make decisions for the good of the entire country, not just Gwen!” 

_ You’re not going to rescue Gwen? _ asked Myrddin. _ I thought you got past the pompous ass stage of your life. _

“Well, you’re certainly being the king of prats,” said Merlin. “I can’t believe you wouldn’t--’

“I am going to rescue Gwen!” bellowed Arthur, finally losing his temper. “We just need to think about how we present this to my advisers and the rest of the country. It won’t look well for noblemen to risk their lives for a serving girl. I am not just a prince anymore, and I can’t just go gallivanting off on adventures. But, I  _ do _ plan on rescuing Gwen, no matter what they think.” 

“Good,” nodded Morgana. “I will organize the provisions.” Morgana’s stare was icier than the winter wind. Arthur shivered as she marched to the door to his room and slammed it shut on her way out. Arthur fervently hoped he would never meet the evil Morgana from his dreams. The real-life Morgana was scary enough. 

“I can help you look for Gwen,” offered Merlin. A warm hand was placed on Arthur’s arm and Arthur sighed. Merlin squeezed his arm and Arthur leaned into the touch, accepting the unspoken apology.

Arthur shook his head. “It’s too dangerous.” 

“Gwen’s my friend. And I’m coming with you,” said Merlin. “If you don’t take me, I’ll follow you. I’ve done it before.” 

Arthur sighed and rubbed his head. “I know you have.” 

“I’m glad that’s settled,” beamed Merlin. “I’ll go get your breakfast then,”

Once Merlin left, Arthur said out loud, “When did I start getting overruled by a servant?”

_ When Merlin first arrived _ , laughed Myrrddin.  _ You know that.  _

***

Gwen’s rescue party was a mess from the start.    


Arthur initially fretted about how to explain to his advisors and knights that he planned on rescuing a servant from a king. With the help of Myrddin, Arthur had just come up with the perfect excuse for Gwen, when a sweating sickness spread through the castle invaliding his advisors and most of his knights. While this resolved Arthur’s initial problem, Arthur now didn’t have enough men. 

Arthur resorted to enlisting four of his least favorite knights, Sir Cearc, Sir Agares, Sir Falwen, and Sir Buwch. These knights only claimed the honor of knighthood because of shady political deals between King Uther and their fathers. They were slow, lazy, and dull, but they were some of the few who had managed to not get the sweating sickness (most likely because they skipped practice).

Though Arthur had managed to convince Morgana to not come along, he was not able to convince Merlin. Merlin gabbed cheerfully as he packed Arthur’s clothes in a pack and Arthur gave Merlin a worried glance. Arthur didn’t want Merlin to come to any harm; Merlin’s addition on the journey made him much more nervous. Arthur eyed Merlin’s skinny body-- Merlin looked like a newborn foal. His legs were skinny and long, his--

_ Stop staring at Merlin’s ass and keep preparing for your journey _ . Myrddin’s voice interrupted Arthur’s train of thought. 

“I’m not staring,” hissed Arthur, feeling rather warm. “I’m worrying.”

_ Merlin will be better protected if you are more focused on preparing for the journe _ y, Myrddin grumbled.  _ Not that Merlin needs much protection anyway.  _

“Shut up,” ordered Arthur in a whisper. But he did admit that Myrddin had a point. He tore his eyes away from Merlin’s body and continued to examine the map of the forest where Gwen was taken. 

Despite Arthur’s reservations about the knights, once the group got into the forest, the rescue mission seemed to be going well. The tracks made by Gwen’s capturers were well hidden, but Arthur’s exceptional skills in tracking kept them on the right path. For the first day or two, the knights stayed mostly silent except for the occasional grumble about sleeping on the hard forest floor and loud panting noises as they trudged their unfit bodies through the forest. 

At the time, Arthur despised the silence. He missed the comradery and the conversations of his knights, the ones that he trained. The ones that had earned their place.  However, when the knights were able to catch their breath on the third day, Arthur desperately began to wish for the silence again.  The knights whined about everything from the blisters forming in their shoes to the food they were fed. However, what really made Arthur’s blood boil was how they talked about Merlin. The knights treated Merlin as if he were no better than a cow pat on their boots. 

“Those useless bastards,” Arthur muttered furiously as he brushed down his horse after the end of a terrible third day. “They act like Merlin should be honored to make them dinner and clean up after them.”

_ You acted like that towards Merlin not too long ago _ , reminded Myrddin. 

“I did not,” said Arthur. “I always treated him with respect.”

_ You used to throw things at him! You still throw things at him!  _

“I throw things at him with respect,” retorted Arthur. 

_ Liar.  _

Arthur opened his mouth to argue, but a loud crashing sound echoed through the forest and accompanied by a loud roar. “What was that, Myrddin?” 

_ I don’t like the sound of that _ , Myrddin responded.  _ That sounds like a chapalu _ .

“A what?” Arthur tried to hold onto his rearing horse, but it slipped out of his hands and dashed into the forest. “Why is it in Camelot’s forest and why have I never heard of it before?”

_ It’s a monster _ , said Myrddin.  _ A very evil fishy ghost panther, if you will. Get your knights in formation and prepare for attack now. If you don’t attack it, it will continue to hunt you until it kills you. _

“Knights!” yelled Arthur. The four knights looked up in surprise from chewing their dinners. “Do you hear that?” 

A roar echoed through the forest that vibrated Arthur’s bones inside his body. The knights turned to look at Arthur with horror. 

“What is it?” Sir Cearc gulped audibly, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. 

“A chapalu,” responded Arthur curtly. Arthur picked up a sword and offered it to Sir Cearac who reluctantly took it. “Get into position.”

“We’re going to fight that...thing?” asked Sir Falwen. "Sire?" He pointed a shaking finger at the forest. 

“Yes, now get up,” Arthur ordered. He grabbed his own sword and cast his gaze about the clearing. “Where did Merlin go?” 

“Being inattentive as usual, my lord,” Sir Agares muttered. “Maybe we can feed him to the beast. He would be a nice diversion.” 

Arthur saw a flash of crimson and he drew his sword. “Say that again, and I’ll make you face the beast first.” 

Instead of cowering, Sir Agares raised an eyebrow. “Everyone knows that boy warms your bed. If you keep talking like that, you’ll regret it.” 

Arthur took a threatening step forward. “Talking like what?” 

“Talking like that boy means more to you than just a warm body.” Sir Agares grinned and Arthur had the sudden urge to smack the smile off of his face with his sword. 

“Arthur!” a voice yelled from behind. “We’ve got to move!” 

Arthur turned to see Merlin sprinting towards him. 

“Arthur, there is a giant… thing in the forest. Haven’t you been hearing it roar?” Merlin panted heavily, resting his hands on his knees. 

“Of course I heard it, you bloody idiot,” said Arthur. “I was just discussing with my knights.” 

“Can you, um, maybe discuss faster?” Merlin scratched the back of his head. “It’s nearly here!”

An earthshaking roar shook the ground and the leaves on the trees around them shivered. 

“Can we run now?” asked Sir Cearc, his knees trembling. 

“No,” bellowed Arthur. “Our best bet is to fight the beast, not outrun it. It’s much too fast.” 

Merlin (the idiot) instantly turned and drew his knife, but the four knights didn’t look convinced. 

“Maybe we should try running first?” offered Sir Falwen hopefully. “It sounds rather big.”

Arthur sighed heavily. “Get into formation behind me. I won’t say it again.” He turned around and heard the shuffle of the knights unsheathing their swords. “Merlin, put that knife away before you hurt yourself and get behind me.” 

Merlin frowned at Arthur. “I can fight.” 

“That’s a direct order from your king,” yelled Arthur. Merlin gave him a hurt look but scampered behind Arthur. 

The roaring was now loud enough that the trees were swaying, as if caught in heavy wind. The horses neighed loudly and reared onto their back legs. 

Arthur stayed focused, gripping his sword and scanned the darkness of the forest. 

“Any tricks or tips, Myrddin?” Arthur murmured quietly. 

_ Aim for the eyes and the nose _ , offered Myrddin.  _ Do not ever turn your back to it. It kills by biting the back of your head to crush your brain _ . 

“Just excellent,” grumbled Arthur. 

The roaring grew closer and a fearsome head entered the clearing with a thousand sharp teeth glinting in the dusk. If Arthur weren’t scared out of his mind, he would have appreciated the beauty of the beast more. Its eyes shone with the same sheen as polished gold, and its black skin shimmered like the hot air on a particularly scorching day. 

The beast growled, a low rumble that seemed to penetrate Arthur’s very heart. Arthur heard a yelp and the unmistakable sounds of his knights running away into the night.

“Are they gone?” Arthur asked Myrddin. “My knights?”

_ Not sure _ , said Myrddin. _ I pretty much can only see what you se _ e. 

“They’re gone,” said a voice from behind him. Merlin. The idiot had stayed behind while Arthur’s knights had run away.

“Run, Merlin,” Arthur urgently whispered to Merlin. “I’ll hold it off. Save yourself.” 

“No, Arthur,” Merlin’s voice was strong and resolute. “I swore I’d follow you and serve you. I don’t back down on my promises.”

The beast’s head tilted and it batted a paw into the clearing. The creature’s body had the blurry opaqueness of a dark spot in the center of your eye. In contrast, its teeth and claws were sharp, both in clarity and in sharpness. 

“Leave, Merlin. I command it,” Arthur ordered. “Have I told you what an awful servant you are? You never follow my orders.” 

“You’re an idiot,” Merlin murmured gently. “I am not going to leave you.” Arthur heard two steps behind him, and Merlin’s familiar red neckerchief emerged into his peripheral vision. Merlin held out the knife he had brandished earlier. Arthur could now see that it was Merlin’s cooking knife which still had bits of carrots on it. 

If Arthur wasn’t busy tightening his grip on his sword in preparation for the beast’s pounce, he would have slapped his forehead with his hand. “You aren’t going to do any help here with a carrot knife.” 

“You look like you need all the help you can get,” Merlin shot back.

_ Let him stay and focus on the beast _ , said Myrddin.  _ Arguing with him does no good for either of you _ .

Arthur grimaced, but focused his attention back to the forest. The creature roared and Arthur got an excellent view of the inside of its mouth. The beast had several sets of very sharp teeth in its mouth, rather like a leech. 

“Merlin, run!” Arthur tried to order Merlin again.

“I’m not leaving without you,” Merlin shouted back. 

The giant paw darted into the clearing and Arthur swung his sword at it. As the paw whizzed by his head with about an inch to spare, Arthur was close enough to realize that the creature was covered in black scales, like a fish. 

Arthur had just emotionally prepared himself to be killed by this creature when Arthur heard the thunderous galloping of horses behind him. Had his knights come back? . 

“Need a little help, sire?” yelled a handsome dark haired man as he charged towards the beast on Arthur’s right. 

“Hiya, Merlin,” shouted a mischievous looking man as he thundered towards the beast on Arthur’s left. 

A huge buff blonde man followed the first man on Arthur’s right and a man whose face had a disconcerting similarity to Gwen’s followed the second on Arthur’s left. 

The men organized themselves into the formation Arthur would have ordered his more competent knights in, and they began to fight the beast. Arthur’s stomach clenched-- not with fear, but with hope. 

As Arthur sliced and dodged, he marveled at the strength and agility of their rescuers. Arthur had fought with a great many men, but had never felt so in sync with another group of men before. The men fought like they read the orders in his mind before he even had a chance to yell them out. Though the men weren’t the most polished of fighters, fighting with these men seemed natural and easy, as if they were his long lost limbs returned to him. 

In almost perfect synchronization, the men advanced on the beast until it retreated with an injured whimper. Arthur stood in the clearing of the forest with his sword drawn until the beast’s roars faded into the distance. Then he turned to face the four men. 

“I would like to offer my sincerest thanks for your immeasurable help in fighting that beast,” Arthur said, wiping the sweat off his brow. 

“We are pleased we could be of aid, King Arthur,” said the handsome brown haired man. “My name is Lancelot. I’d like to introduce my companions: Gwaine, Pecival and Elyan.” Lancelot pointed to the mischievous man, the blonde, and the man who looked like Gwen.

“Heyyy,” Gwaine gave a little wave and threw back his long ridiculous hair. 

Percival nodded at Arthur and Elyan gave Arthur a little bow. 

“What brings you to this area of the forest?” Arthur took a better look at the four men. They did not appear to be nobles as they wore simple tunics and pants. Given their fighting prowess, Arthur was worried that they could potentially be bandits; yet, Merlin knew at least one of the men.

“We are attempting to rescue my sister, sire,” said Elyan. “She’s been captured. You may know her. She works in Camelot, King Arthur.” 

“She does?” asked Arthur. “What’s her name?” 

“Guinevere, sire,” Elyan responded. 

“Guinevere!” exclaimed Arthur. So that explained the similarities in their features. “I didn’t know she had a brother. How did you know that Gwen needed rescuing?”

“We decided to investigate a rumor,” explained Lancelot. 

“A little bird told us,” Gwaine added. The only thing Arthur hated more than the wink Gwaine gave to Merlin was the blush that blossomed on Merlin’s face after the wink. Arthur’s chest tightened with an emotion he could not quite place. 

“Do you two know each other?” Arthur looked between Gwaine and Merlin curiously. 

“I’ve met both Gwaine and Lancelot,” responded Merlin. Arthur hated the way Merlin smiled at Gwaine, like Gwaine was anything to smile at, the long haired bastard. “They’ve helped me and Gwen before.”

_ They did? _ asked Myrddin.  _ Interesting. This is very different.  _

“I see,” said Arthur and the feeling in his chest tightened even more, becoming nearly suffocating. 

“They can help us find Gwen.” Merlin looked at Arthur with such hopeful eyes that the tightness in Arthur’s chest dissipated. 

“Good,” Arthur cleared his throat and tore his eyes away from Merlin’s annoyingly adorable puppy dog face. “Excellent. Yes.” 

“It is an honor, sire,” said Lancelot with a polite bow. “An honor to travel with the highly esteemed King of Camelot.”

“Sire,” Percival bowed his head respectfully.

Elyan knelt before Arthur. “I appreciate your help finding my sister, sire,” Elyan gave Arthur a warm smile. “Not many kings are noble enough to care about the servants, much less know their names.” 

Gwaine snorted at Elyan’s last statement, but said nothing.

“With all of our strength combined, I am sure we will be successful in rescuing Gwen,” said Arthur. “But I propose we strategize later. I wish to rest before the day's journey tomorrow.” 

“Well, I’m certainly knackered,” yawned Gwaine. “It’s been a long day rescuing kings in distress.” He smirked at Arthur. 

Arthur opened his mouth to respond, but Myrddin murmured,  _ Leave it be _ . _ Gwaine is best not provoked. Try to act kingly for onc _ e.

Arthur watched as Percival appeared to try to smack Gwaine covertly, but not knowing his own strength managed to nearly push Gwaine to the ground. Arthur smiled. He decided that he liked Pericival already. 

The men set up their nighttime camp with none of the grumbling about the hard forest floor Arthur heard from his five knights. When Arthur got into his bedroll, he tried not to notice that Merlin had set up his bedroll by Gwaine instead of his customary spot by Arthur. 

“Why is Merlin all the way over there?” asked Arthur, trying not to sound too petulant. “He’s  _ my  _ servant.”

_ I don’t know _ , responded Myrddin.  _ Why don’t you ask Merlin yourself? Or just order him to sleep by you if you are so terrified by the night _ . 

Arthur considered shouting an order to Merlin, but Arthur felt rather embarrassed to ask for Merlin to sleep next to him, like a little boy crying for his parents. 

“Do you think I can trust them, Myrddin?” Arthur murmured softly. “I find Gwaine to be particularly loathsome.”

_ Merlin trusts them _ , Myrddin responded.  _ I would trust Merlin’s judgement on this one. You may find you enjoy their company more than the four useless knights that accompanied us here _ .

“Do you think they will be any help finding Gwen?” Arthur asked. “They haven’t got the training the noblemen have been provided.”

Myrddin laughed lightly.  _ I wouldn’t put too much faith in the training of noblemen. Trees could be trained to fight better than those four knights who deserted us _ . 

Despite himself, Arthur laughed. “I suppose so, Myrddin.” 

_ One of your few skills you possess is that you tend to have an excellent eye for fighters. What did you think of how our rescuers fought today? _

“They were excellent,” replied Arthur. “Nearly as good as my top knights.” 

_ There you go. They should be of some help with Gwen then.  _

“I suppose.” 

_ Arthur, when deciding on someone’s skill set, use your eyes and your own discernment instead of relying upon the judgement of the social structure. As the king, you have the unique power to remake the social structure for the good of the people, instead of for the wealthy.  _

“I thought my job as king was to uphold the traditions of the past.” 

_ You don’t want to repeat the past, Arthur _ , Myrddin’s voice was unusually subdued, almost saddened.  _ You want to remake it. _

“I do?” Arthur yawned, but there was no reply, so Arthur drifted off into sleep. In his dreams, he watched a fuzzy image of Merlin curled on the ground sobbing. But when Arthur rushed over to comfort him, Merlin evaporated into a fluffy cloud-shaped dragon and soared off into the forest sky. 

***

Traveling with Gwaine, Lancelot, Elyan and Percival was much better than traveling with Arthur’s four former knights. For one, they covered more ground much faster. Instead of taking two weeks to get to Gorre, Arthur estimated they would arrive in about a week. Another difference was that these men treated Merlin with much more respect-- all except for Gwaine that is. 

Gwaine never stopped teasing Merlin. Gwaine was always talking to Merlin, making him smile, and tousling his hair. When Arthur inquired how Gwaine and Merlin met, Merlin merely said, “He’s a friend from the tavern,” and gave Gwaine a cheeky grin. 

As he made his way through the forest, Arthur was plagued by flashbacks of all the times Merlin had been late or missing because he was at the blasted tavern. Arthur had assumed Merlin was there for the drink, not the company. What did Merlin do with Gwaine in the tavern? Did they merely drink all night? Did they talk? What did they talk about? Did they play games? Did they rent a room at the tavern? Did they-- 

Arthur took a deep breath and shook his head. There was no point in letting his mind run away with itself. To quiet his racing mind, Arthur decided to talk to Elyan and Lancelot, who were much more agreeable than Gwaine. 

Elyan told a tale of people far far away who made swords by folding the metal again and again to strengthen and purify the sword. Elyan thought this tale may have been just a fairy tale told by his father, but Lancelot and Arthur argued that there may be an element of truth to the story. Arthur enjoyed the lighthearted conversation, speculating about the existence of these expert swordsmen. 

When the group decided to set up camp for the night, Arthur was in decidedly better spirits until he noticed Gwaine and Merlin huddled together. Gwaine had his arm around Merlin and they muttered urgently about something. 

Arthur quietly sidled over to a tree near Gwaine and Merlin and pretended to fix the strap of his bag. 

“---I worry about you,” Gwaine was saying. “You’ve had this infatuation for so long. It’s not healthy. And he’s taking advantage of you.”

“I can’t help it,” Merlin replied glumly. “I wish I could stop my feelings, but I can’t.”

“I would like to offer you advice, but I’m afraid I would be the wrong person,” said Gwaine. “Acting rashly is so much a part of my personality that I don’t even know who I’d be if you took that away.”

Merlin laughed. “Though annoying, I do find it to be very endearing.” 

“You are too kind, Merlin.” Arthur hated how low and soothing Gwaine’s voice became when he talked to Merlin like this. “Which is exactly why I am worried. I don’t want you to be taken advantage of---” Gwaine said something else, but Arthur heard a snap in the forest and jumped wildly. 

“Didn’t mean to scare you.” Lancelot leaned casually against a tree. “Sire.” Arthur wondered how long Lancelot had been standing there. 

“You didn’t scare me,” said Arthur in what he hoped was a nonchalant manner. ( _ Liar _ , teased Myrddin.)

“I just wanted to let you know that dinner is ready, my king,” Lancelot bowed in a manner Arthur could only describe as suspicious, if bows could even be suspicious. “Percival is surprisingly an excellent cook.” 

“Excellent, yes,” said Arthur. “I just need to…” He gestured at his bag vaguely. 

“I can wait.” Lancelot folded his arms and settled back against the tree.

Arthur suddenly got the feeling that Lancelot knew exactly why Arthur was crouched in the forest. He wondered what Lancelot knew about Merlin and Gwaine that he didn’t. Arthur brushed the dirt off of his bag and stood up. 

“Let us eat, shall we?” Arthur nodded back towards the camp. 

Lancelot gave Arthur a polite smile in return and they followed the enticing smell of stew back to the camp. 

At night, Merlin still slept next to Gwaine, and an unhappy knot formed in Arthur’s stomach. 

“They are hiding something,” Arthur whispered to Myrddin. “Gwaine and Lancelot and Merlin.” Arthur felt the bitter dregs of betrayal stir within him. 

_ Or they are protecting something _ , responded Myrddin.  _ Don’t be so paranoid, Arthur _ .

“What would they be protecting?” asked Arthur. “What would Merlin need to protect from me?” 

_ Keep an open mind, Arthur. And listen to your kind heart.  _

“I’m not feeling kind. My heart is feeling rather battered and betrayed at the moment.” 

_ I would imagine so _ , said Myrddin.  _ I do believe the trio are hiding something from you not out of spite, but rather fear _ . 

“Fear?” sputtered Arthur. “What on earth would Merlin have to fear from me? I nearly died for him.” 

_ Because you are the king. And you have the duty to uphold the traditions of the past. _

“So?” 

_ So Merlin cares very deeply for you. He wishes to make your life easier.  _

“Stop speaking in riddles, Myrddin. It’s so damn frustrating.”

_ I’m afraid I can so no more. Just remember to keep an open heart and mind.  _

Arthur grumbled and pulled his bedroll around him a little tighter. In the distance, he heard Gwaine’s quiet murmur followed by Merlin’s light laugh. Arthur rolled over onto his stomach and tried not to feel too lonely. 

Luckily, for the rest of the journey, Arthur found himself too exhausted by the end of the day to spend any time worrying about Merlin. Gorre was a relatively close kingdom to Camelot, but was extraordinarily hard to get to, as it rested on the top of an extremely steep and rocky mountain. Traveling to Gorre required navigating extremely treacherous paths carved into the side of the mountain and crossing over a set of perilously constructed bridges. 

After what seemed like an eternity of traversing the nearly vertical path to Gorre, the group began to see the turrets of the castle of Gorre rising above the trees, like a blackened set of teeth. The weather turned increasingly stormy as dark clouds loomed above them and mist dampened their clothes. 

“Couldn’t have picked a gloomier place to put a castle, eh?” asked Gwaine grinning up at the intimidating sight. 

“It’s ugly,” agreed Percival frowning as he squinted into the forest. “The architecture is far too blocky.” 

“We’re gonna get Gwen back,” Elyan fingered the hilt of his sword and glared up at the castle. “I swear it.” 

Lancelot put his arm around Elyan’s shoulder. “I think we need a plan.” 

“I was thinking--” started Arthur. 

“Didn’t know you could,” interrupted Merlin with a smirk. Arthur smacked him upside the head and sent him away to set up camp

As Merlin puttered about making their nightly stew, the four warriors and Arthur sat by the fire and hashed out the details of the plan. Arthur was to enter the castle under the pretext of ensuring Gwen was safe before sending the ransom. Meanwhile, Gwaine and Merlin would scope out the castle, find a hidden escape route and smuggle Gwen out of the castle. Arthur greatly protested Merlin’s role as a spy (“I promised to keep Merlin safe-- having him sneak about the castle of an evil king protected only by carrot knife and an idiot with hair is not exactly how I envisioned keeping Merlin from harm.”), but was finally won over when Lancelot offered to accompany Merlin instead of Gwaine. 

When they finally sorted through all of the details, the clouds had abated and harsh moonlight cast shadows on the castle. Arthur was just wiggling into his bedroll when he heard a rustling noise besides him. Arthur rolled over on his side, expecting to see Lancelot wanting to discuss some last minute change in the plan, but was surprised to see Merlin. 

“Merlin,” Arthur tried not to sound too bitter. “What a surprise.” 

“Miss me?” smirked Merlin. “Bet you did.” 

“You think I would miss your presence?” scoffed Arthur. "I have had a wonderful few nights of silence without someone yammering in my ear all the time."

Merlin snuggled into his bedroll and rolled over to face Arthur. “Be careful out there, Arthur.” In the dark, Merlin’s eyes were the black-blue of the sea at night. “Keep yourself alive. Camelot needs you.” 

“I’ll try,” said Arthur. 

“That’s an order,” murmured Merlin. “You better not disobey me.” Merlin’s hand emerged from the bedroll and Arthur’s heart beat so loudly he was sure Merlin could hear it. 

“I’m the one that gives the orders, Merlin.” Arthur’s mouth appeared to be moving of its own volition because Arthur’s brain had decided to take a vacation. “You’re a terrible servant, have I ever told you that? You should be put in the stocks.”

“Only about once a day.” Merlin’s hand hovered over Arthur’s face and he ever so gently tucked a lock of hair behind Arthur’s ear. 

Arthur felt as though he could not swallow, could not move, could not tear his gaze away from the absolute worst servant he’s ever had. Arthur’s ear tingled with the knowledge that Merlin’s hand remained hovering just inches above. 

To Arthur’s great disappointment and relief, Merlin withdrew his hand back into the bedroll and closed his eyes. 

Arthur took a deep breath in and held it. He was feeling some sort of emotion, but he couldn’t quite place his finger on it. Was it anxiety about the plan tomorrow? Was it worry about Merlin getting hurt? Was it something else? 

“Goodnight, Arthur,” Merlin’s sleepy voice reminded Arthur of those glorious few months when Merlin was confined to Arthur’s bed. Looking back, Arthur didn’t know how he slept so blissfully next to Merlin nearly a year ago, when now he crumbled under a single touch, an arms length away. 

“Goodnight, Merlin.” Arthur took a deep breath to do something-- anything-- but the king, so courageous in battle, retreated back to his bedroll and closed his eyes. 

***

The next day, Arthur, Gwaine, Percival and Elyan rode to Gorre, while Merlin and Lancelot slipped into the forest.

When they arrived at the outer walls of the imposing beometh of the castle, Arthur yelled to the guards to inform them that King Arthur from Camelot had arrived. 

There was a hasty flurry of activity and the large wooden door to the castle gate creakily opened. Arthur rode through, flanked by Gwaine, Percival, and Elyan. 

Inside the castle walls, Arthur looked around in horror. While the guards appeared strong and well-fed, the people were gaunt and sickly. They pulled carts of produce with weary arms, while the guards laughed and jeered. 

_ This is awful _ , Myrddin commented.  _ Those poor poor people _ . 

A woman with oozing sores on her body tripped and fell. She tried to heave herself up with spindly arms, only for one of the guards to lob a potato at her, which hit her head with a dull thud. The woman scrambled to grab the potato, before clutching her head, which had begun to bleed. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur saw Gwaine’s hand fly to the hilt of his sword. Arthur met Gwaine’s eyes and gave a tiny shake of his head. 

Gwaine looked furious and opened his mouth, no doubt to give Arthur a piece of his mind, but Arthur sent Gwaine a stern glare. 

“Gaius once told me that while you can treat the symptoms for a disease, it is much easier to stop the disease at its source,” Arthur muttered in Gwaine’s ear. “Anyway, I don’t think it will fare well for Guinevere if we start slaying the guards before we even enter the castle.” 

Gwaine closed his mouth and loosened his grip on his sword. Arthur nodded at him, and they continued further until they reached the castle itself. 

In front of the castle’s imposing black doors stood a handsome man. A golden crown encircled his blonde hair and his strong angular face was composed in a welcoming smile. When Arthur’s horse plodded a little closer, Arthur could see the man’s vibrant green eyes, the ones Morgana described in his bedchamber, what seemed like so long ago. 

“King Arthur!” cried King Maleagant. He spread his arms out and his fur lined cloak streamed behind him. “Welcome to the Gorre Castle.” 

Arthur dismounted from his horse. “I wish I could say it was a pleasure to be here.” 

“Ah, let’s save the politics for later,” King Maleagant stepped forward and bowed deeply. “It is good to see you here, dear Arthur. Good to see you.” 

“I am eager to negotiate the release of the good lady Morgana.” Arthur bent his head stiffly in the faintest shadow of a bow. “It has been far too long. Camelot misses her. I trust I can find her unharmed.” 

King Maleagant clasped both hands to his heart. “I promise the queen is quite well taken care of. I understand your concern and I do want you to know that I am terribly sorry about all this. I wouldn’t have done it if it weren’t absolutely necessary.” King Maleagant turned worried green eyes to Arthur. 

“Apologize?” asked Arthur shortly. 

“I understand you must be angry,” said King Maleagant. “I promise this will all be cleared up at dinner. Now, come in! Make yourselves at home.” 

King Maleagant offered Arthur a comfortable room with a large bed, a sparsely populated bookshelf, and a window overlooking the courtyard. The king let him freshen up before inviting Arthur and the men to perhaps the most boring dinner of Arthur’s life. 

Arthur expected King Maleagant to be more like other evil royals Arthur had encountered over the years-- violent, dramatic, and petty. However, Arthur was almost disappointed to find that instead Maleagant was the terrible combination of extraordinarily dull and annoyingly loquacious. His somniferous voice and mannerisms made Arthur fight to keep his eyes open. After apologizing extensively about kidnapping Gwen, Maleagant launched on a long explanation of how this plot was the only way he could help the citizens of Gorre. Arthur tried not to yawn too broadly as Maleagant waffled on about his crazy aging father, King Bagdemagus, who spent nearly all of the kingdom’s wealth on extravagant construction projects (King Maleagant pointed out the window with a hand shaking with anger; Arthur peered out disinterestedly at a couple of ugly stone buildings). Maleagant blathered on about how King Bagdemagus was then forced out in a coup by his own advisers and then died, leaving Maleagant to sort out the mess of the steadily declining kingdom. 

Long after dinner had came and went, Arthur interrupted Maleagant’s rant on King Bagdemagnus’s ineptitude to ask: “When can I see Morgana?” 

“Ah yes, of course.” Maleagant smiled at Arthur. “You must be worried about her.” 

Maleagant (finally) got up from the dinner table and led Arthur to a room and paused before it. “I must let you know…”

“If she has come to any harm, you shall forever live to regret it,” Arthur growled, his hand flying to his sword. 

Maleagant held up his hands. “We didn’t do anything to her. About a few days ago, she just became very… sweaty.” 

Maleagant opened the door to reveal Gwen sleeping peacefully in bed, clearly suffering from the same sweating affliction that had indisposed Arthur’s knights and advisors.

“Ah,” Arthur strode in the room to examine Gwen. She appeared to be well and unharmed, besides the vast quantities of liquid leaking from her pores. “Make sure she is well hydrated. If she doesn’t get better soon, you will wish you were afflicted instead.” 

Arthur swept past Maleagant to return to his chambers, shutting the door behind him with a relieved sigh. 

“Do you believe him, Myrddin? I feel inclined to help him, not for his sake, but for the sake of his people who seem to be bearing the brunt of his father’s actions. Maleagant doesn’t seem to be quite the evil man I imagined. He said he was doing this for the good of his people.” 

_ You were lulled by his words, but the best judge of character stems from one’s actions. What do you think Maleagant’s actions say about him?  _

Arthur frowned. “He sits in his castle, while his people starve in the streets, beaten by his guards.” 

_ Good, Arthur. Sometimes you surprise me with your insight.  _ Myrddin sounded pleased _. I’d like to add that kidnapping the queen of Camelot and threatening to dismember her does not seem like the actions of a good man _ .  _ Moreover, theft does not seem to be the only way to bring wealth back to the kingdom.  _

Arthur mulled on Myrddin’s words as he changed into his sleep clothes (forgoing the night shirt as it seemed to have shrunk). Arthur climbed into the bed and was just drifting off to sleep, when he heard Merlin’s voice. 

“Arthur!” Merlin’s voice sounded muffled. 

“Merlin?” Arthur asked sleepily. 

“Arthur! You got to open the door.” 

Arthur obligingly got up from his bed and opened the door. He looked left and right. No one was there. Arthur yawned, scratched his belly, and shrugged. He turned around and flopped back onto the bed. 

_ I take back everything I said about you impressing me with your insight _ , Myrddin commented. 

“Not that door, Arthur.” Merlin’s voice sounded tired. “Try looking behind the bookshelf.” 

Arthur grunted and rolled out of bed again. He walked to the bookshelf and stared at it. It looked like an ugly bookshelf. “What do you want me to do, Merlin?”

“There should be some sort of lever,” said Merlin. “The door is stuck on my side. You are going to have to pull it from yours.” 

Arthur frowned at the bookshelf. “Pull it where?” 

“Just pull the bookshelf!” Merlin yelled from behind the door. 

“Alright, alright. No need to get angry about it.” Arthur grabbed the sides of the bookshelf and gave a slight tug. The bookshelf swung open like a door to a dirty and sweaty Merlin crouched in a dark passageway. 

“Arthur!” Merlin whispered. “Did you find Gwen?” Merlin tried to clamber out of the passageway, but tripped and fell into Arthur’s arms. 

“Yes.” Merlin’s presence seemed to have caused his brain to retreat to a back corner of his head. Merlin shivered and Arthur tightened his grip around Merlin’s skinny body.

“Ah,” said Merlin. “I see.” Merlin’s eyes roamed over Arthur’s bare chest and Merlin’s ears turned scarlet.

“Yes,” repeated Arthur feeling rather stupid. 

“You don’t--” Merlin swallowed and licked his lips. “You didn’t put on your nightshirt.” 

“I get hot.” Merlin’s hand brushed Arthur’s chest and Arthur couldn’t help a sharp intake of breath.

_ You get stuck in your nightshirt _ , commented Myrddin.  _ You always need Merlin’s help _ .  _ You have a big head.  _

“Hot.” Merlin’s gaze seemed to be stuck somewhere below Arthur’s neck. Merlin wet his lips and Arthur was strangely captivated by Merlin’s pink tongue. “It’s hot?” 

“Yes.” Arthur’s brain seemed to be stuck on this one word. His head was fuzzy as if it was stuffed with wool.

_ You two are such idiots, I swear _ , Myrddin sighed.  _ Stop hugging Merlin and ask him about the passageway.  _

“The passageway!” Arthur’s brain struggled to form a sentence. 

“What?” Merlin’s eyes seemed reluctant to leave the territory below Arthur’s neck to peer up at Arthur’s face. 

“How did you get here?” Arthur nodded towards the secret passageway behind the bookshelf. “You smell, by the way.”

“Well, you’re not exactly a flower in bloom either.” Merlin disentangled himself from Arthur and gave him a proud grin. “Lancelot and I made some new friends. They told us about the old servant passageways that run throughout the castle. They were abandoned nearly a hundred years ago when the passageways began collapsing, but most of them are still intact. Lancelot went off to find Gwen and I went to find you.” 

“Gwaine, Elyan and Percival are in the rooms to the left of mine,” said Arthur. “Can we get to them?”

Merlin shook his head. “Unfortunately, the passageway is blocked past your room. We can’t get through to them.” 

“That’s alright.” Arthur was privately pleased that Merlin was not able to reach Gwaine. He felt very strongly that Gwaine was a bad influence on Merlin. “Good work, Merlin.” 

“Thanks!” Merlin’s face brightened and he beamed at Arthur. 

“Where are you and Lancelot camping out?” 

“In these passageways,” Merlin nodded back towards the dark passageway. “We decided it is best if we kept well hidden.”

“You plan on sleeping in there?” asked Arthur incredulously as he peered into the darkness. “It looks disgusting and it smells.” Arthur wrinkled his nose. 

“Well, I’m not thrilled about it, but yes,” Merlin shrugged. 

Arthur shook his head in disgust. “If you can get about half of that dirt off of you, you can sleep in here. I won’t have my servant smelling like he was rotting in a bog for half a century.” Arthur nudged the bowl of water towards Merlin and Merlin smiled. 

Arthur lay in bed, turning his back to give Merlin some privacy as he washed. Arthur waited for the dip of the bed signifying that Merlin was done with his wash and ready for sleep, but when none came, Arthur called out, “Merlin?” 

“Yes,” came a voice somewhere from the floor. 

“What on earth are you doing?”

“Sleeping.”

“Where are you sleeping?”

“On the floor?” Merlin sounded uncertain. 

“Stop being an idiot and get in bed,” ordered Arthur. 

“My clothes are dirty. If I get your bed dirty, I’ll never hear the end of it. I know you.” 

“Put on my nightshirt,” Arthur suggested. 

There was a short silence before Merlin said, “Alright then.” 

The familiar dip when Merlin joined him in bed brought Arthur back to those comforting nights when Merlin recovered in Arthur’s bed. The thought was so calming that Arthur’s muscles unclenched for the first time in a while.

“Is Gwen alright?” Merlin asked quietly. 

“Gwen is fine,” reassured Arthur. “She has the sweating sickness, but she’s strong. I am confident she will recover.” 

“Oh good,” Merlin gave a deep sigh of relief and rolled onto his back. 

Arthur closed his eyes and tried to get his body to relax further into sleep. He took a deep breath in and tried to let it out slowly. 

“Arthur?” Merlin sounded hesitant.

“What?” 

“Thank you.” 

“For what?” Arthur wrinkled his brow, searching his mind for something he did. Unfortunately, his ability to formulate coherent thought seemed to be inversely proportional to Merlin’s closeness.

“Just because.” Merlin pulled the covers up over his body and wiggled his body into a comfortable position. 

“That’s not an answer. Why are you thanking me?”

“Well, I’m not thanking you anymore. I am formally rescinding my thank you.” 

“You can’t do that,” protested Arthur.

“Yes, I can.”

“You’re an idiot,” said Arthur fondly. 

Merlin began to laugh and Arthur joined him. When their chuckles had subsided, Arthur whispered, “Goodnight, Merlin.” 

“Goodnight, Arthur,” came the reply. When Merlin’s head nestled into Arthur’s arm, Arthur was already deep into a dreamless sleep. 

***

Arthur grumpily woke to a bit of hair tickling his nose. Arthur tried to brush the hair away, but found that it was connected to a head resting upon his chest: Merlin’s head. 

Looking down at Merlin, Arthur felt a strange protectiveness rise within him. Arthur’s nightshirt was too large for Merlin and had slipped off Merlin’s shoulder, exposing a sharp clavicle. Merlin looked like a statue Arthur had seen once. It had come from an empire from far away and it was made of marble with graceful elegant limbs arrayed about its head. 

_ Take a photo, it’ll last longer _ . Myrddin’s voice was an unwelcome intrusion to the scene.

“What?” Arthur whispered. “Take a what?”

_ My jokes are wasted on you _ . 

“Your jokes are terrible,” muttered Arthur. “Half the time they don’t make sense.” Arthur rolled Merlin off his chest and begrudgingly removed himself from the bed. Arthur dressed himself, coached by Myrddin through a few minor mishaps ( _ Arthur, you do realize, you need to put your head through the center hole-- the other holes are for your arms _ ), and exited the room to break his fast with King Maleagant. 

King Maleagant was just as apologetic and just as dull as he was yesterday. Arthur took Maleagant up on his offer of a tour of the castle, thinking that he could at least scout out the space, in case there was a fight. However, Arthur didn’t factor in the extent of the soporific effect of Maleagant’s voice and he spent most of the time pinching himself to avoid falling asleep where he stood. 

It was nighttime before Arthur finally escaped from the clutches of the king. On his way back to his chambers, Arthur decided to check upon Gwen. 

Perhaps still suffering from the sedative effect of Maleagant, Arthur was too inattentive to think about barging in on a lady, and so when he opened the door, he was surprised to see Lancelot wiping Gwen’s forehead and holding her hand. It was not an explicit scene, but Arthur felt as though he had stumbled upon an incredibly intimate moment. Lancelot himself had told Arthur that he knew Gwen, but Arthur never suspected any sort of romantic overtures in their acquaintance. 

“Hello, sire,” said Lancelot calmly, turning to face Arthur. “Would you like to join us?” 

“I just wanted to come in and check on Gwen before retiring to bed,” said Arthur, feeling rather bewildered. “Aren’t you worried about being caught by the guards?”

“Gwen’s fine. She should be feeling well enough to travel tomorrow,” Lancelot smiled gently down at sleeping Gwen’s sweaty face. “Are you alright, my lord?”

Arthur suddenly realized he was still in the middle of the room with his mouth open, staring at Lancelot and Gwen. Arthur cleared his throat. “Yes, I am quite well. It has just been a long day.” 

“Did Merlin go over the plan with you, sire?” asked Lancelot.

“A plan?” Arthur shook his head. “An additional plan?”

“I’ll take it that he didn’t.” Lancelot tapped his chin thoughtfully. “Funny, he told me that he found your room last night and so I assumed you knew. What mischief did you two get up to last night?” 

Arthur frowned in confusion. “We slept together.” 

Lancelot gazed at Arthur with a bizarrely intense scrutiny, then shook his head. “My apologies, sire. I have no right to pry.” 

“Since, Merlin never mentioned a plan,” said Arthur. “Perhaps you could fill me in instead?”

“Long story short, Merlin found the old king. I believe his name is King Baudemaude?” 

“Bagdemagus,” Arthur corrected. 

“Thank you, sire,” said Lancelot. “Merlin found King Bagdemagus in the dungeons with help from--”

“In the dungeons?” asked Arthur. “Maleagant told me the king was dead.” 

“Well, it turns out Maleagant was lying about a lot of things,” explained Lancelot. “Apparently Bagdemagus was not planning on passing his crown down to Maleagant. Maleagant found out and got rid of his father. And all those guards you see? Those are mercenaries hired by Maleagant, which is partly why Maleagant is so desperate to get the ransom from Camelot. He hasn’t had the money to pay the men in months and he depends on the men to maintain his rule.” 

“How are we to be sure that Bagdemagus is telling the truth?” Arthur began to pace back and forth in the small chambers.

“Merlin and I talked to the townspeople and they corroborated the story,” said Lancelot. “Maleagant is not popular with the people of Gorre.” 

“What part do we play in this rebellion?” Arthur must have said this a little too loud as Gwen stirred and blinked open sleepy eyes at Lancelot. Lancelot smiled rather dopily at her and Gwen's face brightened.

“Go back to sleep, love,” Lancelot stroked Gwen’s forehead gently. “You need your strength for tomorrow.” 

Arthur cleared his throat. “I do not wish to disturb Guinevere. I’m sure Merlin can fill me in.” 

Lancelot smiled gratefully at Arthur. “Thank you, sire.”

Arthur bid Lancelot and Gwen a quick goodnight and retired to his own chambers. He washed his face and climbed in bed. Merlin was already wrapped deeply in the blankets with only a tuft of hair visible. Arthur was struck by such a strange feeling of tenderness at Merlin’s pillow-ruffled hair resting on the pillow next to him. It seemed so familiar and comfortable.

“Hello Arthur,” Merlin yawned and turned his head to look at Arthur. 

“Glad that you are working hard as always,” Arthur tousled Merlin’s hair roughly. “Lancelot told me there is a plan that you neglected to tell me.” 

“So there is.” Merlin blinked sleepily at Arthur. 

“Were you going to tell me about it? Or just sleep in my bed and let me figure it out in the morning?” 

Merlin laughed. “You don’t play a very big part in it so I thought you wouldn’t need the details,” Merlin teased. 

“You are utterly useless.” Arthur lightly smacked Merlin on the side of his head. “So what is this plan?” Arthur lay down and faced Merlin. 

Arthur wasn’t sure if it was the dinner or perhaps the leftover sleep-inducing effect of Maleagant, but as Merlin murmured the plan to Arthur softly, Arthur became entirely unable to focus. He kept getting distracted by a few unruly hairs that stuck the wrong way up on Merlin’s head, the fine hairs of Merlin’s eyelashes, and the beautiful blue of Merlin’s eyes. However, Arthur was cognizant enough to realize that his role in the plan was relatively minor. Besides Myrddin would fill him in on anything he forgot. 

***

The next day, Arthur informed Maleagant that he wished to learn more about the valiant protectors of Gorre. Maleagant happily rounded up his guards and paraded them in front of Arthur. Arthur suffered through a wailing battle song that he imagined was likely the inspiration for the cyhyraeth, a sort of mythical banshee that Camelot’s villagers wholeheartedly believed in. 

When the painful sounds had finally stopped, Arthur stood up and cleared his throat. “Esteemed guardsmen of Gorre,” Arthur let his voice ring throughout the hall. “I will not be paying a ransom for the queen. I understand the king has promised payment for your work these last few months, but without the ransom you will not be paid for your services.” 

King Maleagant slowly turned to Arthur with a fake smile on his face. The guards shifted uneasily, eyeing one another, until one brave guard yelled out, “King Maleagant. Is this true?”

“King Arthur wishes to rile you up,” Maleagant stood up to face Arthur. “Perhaps I have been too kind to him. Perhaps he doesn’t believe that if he does not pay the ransom, the queen will lose a limb… or two.” 

Arthur merely smiled. “Your leverage over me is dependent on having the queen. You shouldn’t be so sure that you maintain this leverage.”

Maleagant’s face turned from condescending beneficence to anger quicker than Arthur could blink. “Detain him!” shouted Maleagant pointing at Arthur. “And bring me the queen!” 

However, many of the guards seemed rather unenthusiastic. “We’re not getting paid?” one yelled to Maleagant. 

“You will get paid!” screamed Maleagant, suddenly looking like the deranged evil king that Arthur initially had imagined inhabited Gorre Castle. “You will be paid as soon as you capture King Arthur.” 

“That’s what you said when you told us to capture the queen of Camelot!” called another guard. 

“She’s gone!” A red-faced guard burst into the room. “The queen has escaped from her rooms!” 

“Find her!” screamed Maleagant. “Find her now!” 

“Stop this nonsense,” came a booming voice from the corner of the room. King Bagdemagus had emerged from behind a rather nondescript landscape painting, which Arthur presumed was another entrance to the servant passages. King Bagdemagus was elderly, with white hair and a white beard. He held himself up tall, supported by his cane. 

Upon King Bagdemagus’s arrival, the chaotic crowd of guards stilled and became silent.

“Father,” Maleagant had turned pale, but he quickly recovered and gave the king a beaming smile. “Father, I’m so relieved to see you. I can’t believe you are alive!” 

“I wish it were so, son,” King Bagdemagus's face fell with sorrow. “But alas, it is not true.”

“Not true?” stammered Maleagant. 

King Bagdemagus turned to face the crowd of guards. “From this moment on, you are released from your duties. You will be compensated for these last few months of labor, which I understand you have not yet been paid for. Please begin preparations to return to your home countries.” 

From behind the king, Gwen carefully stepped out of the passageway looking pale and wobbly. Worried she would fall, Arthur quickly moved across the room to take Gwen’s arm. Gwen gave him a very small sweaty smile. 

“The queen will be returned,” said King Bagdemagus. “With sincere apologies from the kingdom of Gorre for her absence.” King Bagdemagus nodded to Arthur who nodded back. 

“No!” Maleagant’s face turned bright red and he screamed, “Guards! You have my word that if you kill those three this instant, you will be handsomely rewarded.” 

Many of the guards simply grumbled and turned to leave, but a small fraction charged at Arthur. Arthur drew his sword to protect Gwen and King Bagdemagus. He fought off the guards with the sudden appearance of Pecival, Elyan, Lancelot, and Gwaine from the secret passageway. Arthur’s men made quick work of the poorly trained mercenary guards, and the rest of the guards quickly left. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur saw Maleagant draw his sword. 

“The Pendragons rule by war and fear,” spat King Maleagant. “Their line is marred by incest, infidelity and betrayal. Many lands have been wronged by Camelot and many kings seek revenge.” 

“Your lies and slander do not phase me,” Arthur said, folding his arms. “Especially coming from someone who lacked the honor to fight a fair fight.” Arthur gestured to the guards. “You can take him away now!”

“Do you not find it suspicious that your father and your sister were targeted within a year?” called Maleagant. “Does not that arouse fears of a greater conspiracy against you and your accursed land?”

“What?” asked Arthur, feeling rather befuddled. 

“You are a weak king,” screamed Maleagant. “The overlord will come for you and your sister next.” 

“My sister?” Arthur was confused. “My sister? I don’t have a sister.” 

_ It’s a long story _ , said Myrddin.  _ We can talk about it later _ . 

“Liar!” Maleagant pointed at Arthur. “Don’t pretend your incestuous relationship with the queen is of an innocent nature!” 

Arthur tried to puzzle that one out, but decided it was not worth deciphering the ramblings of a madman. “It does not matter if I have a sister or not. Maleagant-- your coup has failed.” 

Maleagant shook his head. He threw his gauntlet at Arthur and his men. “A duel to the death. The winner gets to take the queen and the kingdom. May the best man win.” 

Arthur stepped forward to accept the gauntlet, but was beaten to it by Lancelot. 

“I accept your duel on behalf of King Arthur,” said Lancelot. “You have caused much grievance to the queen and I fight for her honor.” Lancelot drew his sword and faced Maleagant. 

Gwen gasped and turned to Arthur with worried eyes. 

“He’ll be fine. He’s an excellent fighter,” whispered Arthur, but he couldn’t help the sinking of his stomach in worry. 

The duel began fast and furious, but Lancelot quickly emerged as a clear winner. Lancelot’s footwork was quick and nimble and his sword danced around Maleagant’s clumsy blows. After a short amount of time, Lancelot finally disarmed Maleagant and held his sword to his neck. 

“Help! Guards!” Maleagant panted harshly and cast his eyes about wildly. “Father, help! Father, he is going to kill me.” 

King Bagdemagus passed a shaking hand over his eyes.

Maleagant’s eyes fell on Gwen. “My queen! Beautiful Queen Morgana. In your captivity, have I not been good to you? Please, spare me. Please,” he begged. 

Gwen walked over and stood over Maleagant. In that moment, Arthur could have mistaken her for a queen. She stood elegantly with a great subtle strength. Her eyes were steely, yet warm with her kind heart. Gwen shared a glance with Lancelot. She gave one graceful nod and Lancelot drew his sword away from Maleagant’s neck. Maleagant broke into shaking sobs. 

“Maleagant. I spare your life, not for your sake, but for that of your father’s.” Gwen turned back to face King Bagdemagus and gave him a gentle smile. 

“Thank you, my dear. I am forever indebted to you. I learn much from your strength and wisdom.” Arthur watched in shock as King Bagdemagus kneeled in a bow normally reserved for royalty.

Gwen’s pretty face glowed and she curtsied. “I have learned much from you, as well.” 

King Bagdemagus creakily got up from his knees and turned to face Arthur. “I apologize for the behavior of my son.” The king heaved a great big sigh. “He was always a difficult boy, but I thought he was good at heart. I have never been so devastated to be wrong.” King Bagdemagus shook his head in dismay.

“I only regret that we had to meet in this way,” replied Arthur. “What do you think caused Malegant’s rebellion?” 

“I retracted his claim to the throne,” said the king. “He took that as a personal slight.”

“Who did you put in his place?”

“No one,” the king shook his head. “I forfeited the rule to the people.”

“What?” Arthur couldn’t believe his ears. “That’s crazy!” 

_ Not crazy. Just about one and a quarter thousand years too early _ , Myrddin commented. 

The king smiled. “That’s exactly what my son said. But you see, I was tired of the people in the kingdom being forced to submit to rules they hated. So I had a plan. I was inspired by the ancient city of Athens and the republic of Rome.” 

“The what and what?” 

“These were lands governed by the people, or by elected representatives of the people. I used the exorbitant salaries normally given to my advisors to build a library and theater for my people. I wanted them to be educated enough to make important decisions about the state. Alas, my advisors and Maleagant conspired against me.”

“I see,” Arthur replied, though he quite honestly did not. 

“When they spent all of the money of the kingdom, they kidnapped your dear Guinevere.” 

“How did you know she was Guinevere?” asked Arthur. 

“Before she was held in the chambers Maleagant showed you, Guinevere was placed in the dungeons with me. We got to talking. She’s a brilliant woman. She gave me hope my vision could still succeed.” 

Gwen smiled and bowed her head. “It was my pleasure.” 

“Now, I would invite you to stay longer, but I imagine you all have had too much of the kingdom of Gorre for a lifetime,” said the king. “I will provide you with provisions for your journey back. You should hurry before the snow begins. I do not wish dear Guinevere’s sickness to worsen.” 

“Thank you,” said Arthur. “Will you be alright here in the kingdom?” 

“I will be alright, thank you very much,” said the king. 

Within half an hour, they were packed and ready to depart with Gwen riding a sturdy horse provided by the king. The king had provided extra furs and tents for the ride home, as the court astronomer predicted snow within ten days.

The return to Camelot was remarkably uneventful until a snowstorm hit the party when they were only three days away from Camelot. The snow was tolerable to trudge through during the day, but Arthur soon realized that the night would be miserable. 

Merlin had already retired by the time Arthur entered their tent. He was curled into a tiny ball under a pile of furs, shivering so much that the whole pile of furs shook with him. 

“Are you cold, Merlin?” asked Arthur. 

“No, I’m dying of the heat,” Merlin said sarcastically with chattering teeth. “Arthur, I think I may freeze to death.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous. We’re all cold,” said Arthur. “It’s snowing and we are in the forest”

“Gwen’s not cold,” said Merlin. 

“Why do you say that?” Arthur pulled off his own boots and began to arrange his fur blankets, as Merlin did look a bit cold.

“She’s sharing body heat,” said Merlin. “With Lancelot.” 

“I don’t think it is entirely appropriate for you to share the private doings of a lady with the whole camp, Merlin.” 

“I meant it in an innocent manner, but I thought it was obvious,” said Merlin. “But then I forgot what an idiot you are.” 

Arthur smacked the quivering pile of furs and Merlin yelped. Arthur didn’t even bother to undress. He got under his own pile of furs and tried his best to get warm. 

“It is rather cold,” mused Arthur. 

“I think my feet may freeze off,” moaned Merlin from somewhere within the pile of furs. 

“It’s a pity you didn’t go into the theater,” retorted Arthur. “You do have a flair for the dramatic.”

There was no response, but the loud clattering of Merlin’s teeth. Arthur looked over at the quivering pile of furs with concern. “Do you want to, uh,” Arthur paused, “Do you want me to warm you up?” 

Merlin’s head suddenly emerged from the pile of furs. “What?” Merlin looked ridiculous, like a wide-eyed baby owl peeking out from a hidey-hole in a tree.

“Nevermind.” Arthur blushed and turned away from Merlin, feeling rather like an idiot.

“I wouldn’t mind being warmer.” The pile of furs scooted closer to Arthur. “I’m very cold.” Merlin put his hand to Arthur’s face and Arthur yelped. 

“Merlin!” exclaimed Arthur. “Your hands are like ice!” He grabbed Merlin’s hands between his own and began to rub heat into them. 

“I told you I was cold,” grumbled Merlin. “You should feel my feet.” Merlin scooted closer to Arthur and stuck his cold feet on Arthur’s shins. 

“Get your feet off of me!” Arthur cried. In response, Merlin merely lifted Arthur’s blanket and rolled right besides him. 

Arthur gasped at the shock of cold air that entered the blankets. Instead of pushing Merlin away like Arthur had intended, Arthur was urged to press his cheek to Merlin’s head by some sort of unseen force. Merlin turned on his side and wrapped a very cold arm around Arthur’s chest. Arthur’s heart seemed to beat extraordinarily loud in his chest, and for some reason, he had lost the ability to breathe properly.

“How are you so warm?” Merlin wiggled his head so that he was nearly lying on Arthur’s chest.

“I’m the king.” Arthur’s thoughts were slow and sluggish. Maybe Merlin’s idioticness was catching. “It’s a kingly trait. To have warm blood.” Despite Merlin’s extremities feeling about the same temperature of the snow outside, a burst of heat flared in his chest as Merlin rubbed his cold hand in circles above Arthur’s heart. 

Merlin sighed and his breath tickled Arthur’s neck. “Goodnight, Arthur.” 

“I will not have a good night, thanks to you and your long cold limbs,” retorted Arthur. “If you steal my pillow in the middle of the night, I will banish you to outside the tent.” 

Merlin seemed to know Arthur was making empty threats because he merely wiggled closer to Arthur and promptly fell asleep. 

The next morning Arthur carefully detangled himself from Merlin, making sure to rise before anyone else woke. As he walked over to brush his horse, he caught a glance at Gwen and Lancelot snuggled under a blanket and fought down a surge of jealousy. Arthur previously had mild longings for the simple life of a peasant, but never before was he possessed with such strong emotion. He wished to be free to do whatever he wished and love whomever he pleased without thinking of the good of Camelot. Others always thought that being a king meant he was in charge and could make the rules, but Arthur wished to be a good king and a good king was a servant to his people. Arthur ached for what he could not have.

Arthur shook his head. This trip to Gorre had put strange thoughts in his head. He picked up his bow and arrows and disappeared into the forest to hunt and clear his mind. 

When he came back to camp, he felt much better. He helped Elyan and Percival skin the rabbits he had caught. When everyone had begrudgingly emerged from their tents to sit around the fire eating the freshly-caught rabbits for breakfast, the talk turned to Arthur. 

“You surprise me, sire,” said Elyan. “If I may say so.” 

“How do I surprise you?” 

“You rescued my sister,” Elyan turned thoughtful eyes to Arthur. “My sister has no royal lineage. Many noblemen wouldn’t bother keeping her safe. You left your kingdom to do so.” 

Arthur shrugged. “Guinevere is an integral part of Camelot. She’s one of the very few who can calm Morgana. Quite frankly, she should be receiving hazard pay for her position.” Arthur nodded to Gwen, who smiled and blushed. Lancelot put an arm around her and she leaned into his touch.

Elyan smiled. “May I speak freely, sire?” 

Arthur gestured for Elyan to continue. 

“Where I have come from, many noblemen only know the names of the servants that they bed, if even that,” Elyan said. “You not only know the names of your servants, but you save their lives. All this with purely noble intentions, no untoward advances and ulterior motivations.” 

Instead of feeling pride, Arthur’s stomach dropped. A vague memory of holding a sleeping Merlin flashed in his mind. True, Arthur would never take advantage of servants--- he had a much too strong moral code for that-- but were his intentions towards Merlin purely noble? 

To make matters worse, Gwen, Lancelot, and Percival each complimented Arthur’s upstanding moral behavior as king. Arthur bowed his head in thanks and tried to smile, but he felt like scum of the earth. Gwaine added a tidbit about a lord he knew who never bedded maids, but forced them to sleep next to him in his bed and stared at them while they slept. Arthur knew Gwaine was baiting him and stopped listening at that point; he wasn’t such an idiot to not see the comparison between him and the lord.

Arthur spent the first half of the day sulking on his horse, looking guiltily at Merlin. Then, realizing he had been staring at his manservant for a good portion of the past four hours, he spent the rest of the day guiltily looking anywhere other than Merlin. 

When night time fell, Arthur retired to the tent early. When Merlin came in, he began to scoot under the furs next to Arthur, but Arthur shook his head and held out his arm to stop Merlin from joining him.

“I think it’s warm enough to sleep apart tonight, Merlin.” 

“Warm!” Merlin snorted incredulously. “It’s colder tonight than it was yesterday! Not everyone has blood like fire. Do you want me to freeze to death?”

“I’m not the only warm body here.” Arthur nodded towards the tent entrance. “Why don’t you steal Gwaine’s warmth for once?”

“What about Gwaine?” Merlin, ever the disobedient servant, flicked Arthur’s palm and wiggled past Arthur’s arm. “Gwaine hogs all of the blankets, Percival snores, and Elyan is already fast asleep.” 

“Oh, so you’ve slept with Gwaine before then?” Arthur tried to make his face the picture of nonchalance, but he inwardly seethed. What a hypocrite Gwaine was!

Merlin shuddered. “Yes, and it was a terrible experience.” 

“Good.” The comment slipped out of Arthur’s mouth before his brain could censor it.

“Good?” Merlin scooted closer to Arthur and poked Arthur’s forehead with a very cold finger. 

“Merlin.” Arthur’s resolve was crumbling faster than Morgana’s unpalatable attempt at shortbread cookies. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“What is a good idea?” Merlin rolled right into Arthur’s arm. Upon feeling Merlin’s frozen nose bury into his neck, Arthur gave up completely. 

“Nothing.” 

“Glad we got that settled.” Merlin threw a long leg over Arthur’s legs and stuck his icy feet under Arthur’s calves. 

Feeling rather that he had already failed at being honorable, Arthur settled his face into Merlin’s hair, resolving to warm Merlin’s cold limbs as punishment for his weakness. He took a deep breath in smelling Merlin’s comforting musk under dirt and sweat. 

“You’re four knights short now, aren’t you?” Merlin sleepily mumbled into Arthur’s shoulder. 

“I suppose so.” Arthur chewed on his bottom lip. “It wasn’t really much of a loss anyway.” 

“You should make Lancelot and Gwaine and Percival and Elyan knights.” Merlin’s hair tickled Arthur’s ear. 

Arthur snorted. “Next, you’ll be saying I should make Gwen a knight.”

“No, no, no. Think about it, Arthur,” said Merlin. “They are better fighters and more loyal than any other potential knights out there. It’s a logical decision and a good choice.” 

“Merlin, you know that wouldn’t be possible,” said Arthur. “The day Gwaine is a knight is the day when you are a sorcerer.” 

A soft snore came from Arthur’s left shoulder. Merlin was already asleep.

“Goodnight, Merlin,” whispered Arthur. 

***

Arthur felt as though he had just closed his eyes, when he was awakened by an extra presence in his tent. Arthur opened his eyes to see Gwaine kneeling threateningly by Arthur’s blankets with folded arms and a disapproving frown.

“What’s happening?” Arthur asked sleepily. The sky outside the tent was still dark and dotted with stars. 

“Warming yourself up there, are you?” Gwaine’s expression darkened from disapproval to anger. “Or taking pleasure from your serving boy?”

Arthur sputtered and turned bright red. “I would never- I would never do- How dare you even imply that to the king?” 

“Merlin doesn’t think you’d take advantage of him,” Gwaine frowned thunderously at Arthur. “I’m not so naive. I’ve known too many nobles in my lifetime to think otherwise.” Arthur saw the glint of a knife in Gwaine’s hand and Arthur wondered if this was a dream. There was no way Gwaine would threaten the king of Camelot so blatantly if this were not so. 

“This is a far more innocent situation than you think. Merlin was cold!” protested Arthur. “I didn’t force him to do anything. He’s the one that forced his frozen self in bed with me!” 

“I know you wouldn’t force Merlin. You wouldn’t have to. Merlin would do anything for you.” The knife twirled in Gwaine’s hands. “And I know he wants to do everything with you, but that doesn’t mean you should.” 

“What are you going on about?” Arthur was rather befuddled. Was Gwaine talking about something else? “I tried to get him to not go on this quest. I told him it was too dangerous.” 

The knife stopped twirling. “I’m talking about hurting him. Specifically, you hurting him and leaving him behind like a discarded toy. Too many common folk are praised one moment, then bowled over by the nobles the next.” 

“I stopped throwing bowls at his head nearly a year ago!” Arthur wracked his brain, but still wasn’t sure what Gwaine wanted from him. He was still half asleep and half convinced this was some terrible nightmare. 

“Bowls?” Now Gwaine looked confused. “Are you being dense on purpose? I meant Merlin’s feelings.” 

Arthur’s bewilderment deepened. “His feelings? He has feelings about me throwing bowls at his head?” 

Gwaine tilted his head in thought. “Are you being an ass or do you really not know?” 

“Know what?” asked Arthur. 

“He really doesn’t know.” Another voice came softly from the tent entrance-- Lancelot. Lancelot gave Gwaine a look that was hidden by the dark of night. 

Gwaine sat back on his haunches and frowned thoughtfully at Arthur. Then, Gwaine threw his head back and laughed. “Arthur, you’re an idiot.” 

_ That’s what I have been saying this whole time _ , Myrddin sighed.  _ I missed Gwaine. _

“What?” Arthur was entirely confused. 

“So far you have proved yourself to be a good man, Arthur.” Lancelot smiled kindly at Arthur. “And a good king.” 

“Good, but dense, perhaps,” snorted Gwaine. “Go back to sleep, Arthur. Keep Merlin warm for me, will you?” 

Arthur opened his mouth to protest, but Merlin nuzzled into his neck and the anger left his body. When he awoke again to the early morning light, the bewildering conversation seemed to be too hazy and ridiculous to be true. When Lancelot and Gwaine acted no different than usual, Arthur simply assumed it was simply a strange dream brought on by stress of the rescue mission.

*****

Their return to Camelot was treated with great fanfare. Arthur had never seen Morgana smile so much in one evening. Morgana had the cooks prepare a great feast for the rescue party, and insisted that Gwen joined them at the table. 

“The four knights that ran away at the beginning of your journey are no longer knights anymore,” Morgana leaned over to tell Arthur during the second course. “They are in the dungeons right now thinking about their cowardice.” 

“Thank you, Morgana,” said Arthur. “I have been thinking that I may have found some new knights to replace them.” Arthur nodded towards Gwaine, Lancelot, Percival and Elyan sitting further down the table.

Merlin, who was serving Arthur wine at the time, gave a little gasp and slopped wine all over the table. 

“Do try to get some in the cup next time, Merlin.” Arthur rolled his eyes. “I think the table has been watered quite enough."

Morgana helped Merlin blot up the wine and beamed at Arthur. “I never thought you’d be so open-minded. You are usually a stickler about tradition. ‘My father would never allow such---’ ” Arthur tuned out Morgana’s rather terrible impression of himself. 

When she stopped her impression, Arthur said, “This quest has taught me that as the king, I have the unique power to remake the social structure for the good of the people, instead of for the good of the wealthy. I think this decision will benefit the people and the kingdom of Camelot.” 

Morgana gave a nod. “That is very wise, Arthur.”   


_ Thief, _ protested Myrddin.  _ That’s what I said! You’re not wise at all, you clotpole. _

After the festivities were over, Morgana accompanied Arthur back to his chambers. “I have heard that the people are very happy with you Arthur.” 

“When you say ‘the people’, are you really referring to yourself?” asked Arthur. 

Morgana shook her head. “No, though I am happy with you, Arthur, I mean the citizens of Camelot. They adore you. They think you most honorable.” 

“Most honorable?” mused Arthur. 

“Yes,” Morgana smiled. “The great King Arthur, they are calling you. They think you have a noble heart.” 

Arthur shook his head. “All for rescuing a servant?” 

“They think it is how you treat the least of us that says the most,” Morgana squeezed Arthur’s shoulder. “Goodnight, Arthur.” 

Arthur entered his chambers to see Merlin waiting there with a stupid little smile next to a large pile of food and a jug of wine. 

“Don’t tell me you are going to eat all of this food?” Merlin said cheekily. “We have to look after your figure. Can’t have your waist getting any bigger than it already is.” 

Arthur rolled his eyes. “I got that for you, you dimwit. I am tired of your bony limbs spearing me in the dark.” 

Arthur waved to Merlin to sit down, and Merlin (with the help of Arthur) slowly picked his way through the pile of food. Merlin happily prattled on about the new gossip he had missed when he was away, while Arthur grunted and helped himself to the wine.

Finally, when the food was gone and Merlin had begun to yawn, Arthur indicated that he wished to get ready for bed. 

“I heard what you said at the table tonight,” Merlin beamed at Arthur. “Are you really going to make them knights?” 

Arthur shrugged. “I thought about it.” 

Merlin grinned as he got out Arthur’s nightclothes. “All of them? Even Gwaine? You know they are not noblemen.” 

“You wanted them to be knights, didn’t you?” grumbled Arthur as Merlin sat him on the bed to wrestle with his boots.

“I didn’t think you’d actually do it.” Merlin seemed to wiggle with joy. 

Arthur’s heart pounded a little faster at the ecstatic look on Merlin’s face. Irrationally, he wanted to keep this look on Merlin’s face forever--- to give him anything and everything he wanted. However, out loud Arthur merely said, “Don’t go thinking this is going to happen every time you suggest something.” 

Instead of laughing like Arthur expected, Merlin bowed his head. “You’re a good king, Arthur,” murmured Merlin. “But more importantly, you are a good man.” 

Arthur gazed at Merlin’s brown hair bent between his knees, inches away from the lacing on his trousers, and felt a certain burning want that he was absolutely sure was not supposed to be felt by a good king or a good man. 

Arthur reached out his hand to pull Merlin to his feet to get him out from between his legs, but Merlin looked up at the same moment. Arthur’s hand ended up Merlin’s cheek and his thumb rested on Merlin’s lips. Merlin opened his mouth and--- Arthur’s heart nearly leapt out of his chest--- slowly licked Arthur’s thumb. Arthur felt a sharp throb of heat as Merlin’s soft tongue tickled the pad of his finger. Arthur’s breathing was ragged and his thumb dipped into Merlin’s mouth before he noticed Merlin’s red cheeks and glazed eyes. 

“Are you drunk?” asked Arthur, removing his hand with great effort. “Merlin, go to bed.” 

“What?” Merlin certainly sounded drunk and sluggish. His face was flushed scarlet and was breathing heavily.

Arthur sighed. “Go back to your chambers, Merlin. You’re drunk.” He pulled Merlin up by the shoulders and shepherded him to the door. Arthur called a servant over and told them to make sure Merlin got back to his rooms safely. 

Arthur shut the door behind him and released a breath he hadn’t known he had been holding. An image of Merlin licking his thumb flashed through Arthur’s mind and Arthur was suddenly too warm once again. To clear his head, Arthur dunked his head into the cold bathwater left in his room by his useless servant. Then he flopped onto his bed and glumly dripped water onto his pillows. 

A deep shame burned through Arthur’s core. After all of that talk about Arthur being a noble king, a good king, a good man, Arthur was simply just another perverted man in a position of power. Arthur couldn’t take advantage of a servant, especially a drunk one. It was simply not right. It pained Arthur to think of losing his manservant-- and his friend-- because he was too drunk to notice Merlin’s intoxication and couldn’t control his own carnal desires. Arthur swore to himself to cut down on the wine and to reduce times when Merlin may be vulnerable to Arthur’s unwelcome advances.

_ That was intense _ . Myrddin’s voice was an unwelcome intrusion into Arthur’s thoughts.  _ For a second, I happily thought that the time had come when I could leave to give you both some privacy. Alas, the idiocy remains and, therefore, so do I. _

“It’s improper.” Arthur rubbed his face with a hand. “It’s disgusting,” he whispered quietly to the bedhsheets. 

_ There’s nothing wrong with liking a bo _ y, said Myrddin.  _ It’s a common practice among the druids. It’s unconventional for Camelot, sure, but you’re the king _ . 

“That’s the problem!” said Arthur. “Not the first bit, but the last.” 

_ That you are the king? _

“Yes, I’d be taking advantage of him,” responded Arthur glumly. “Besides even if he were to be with any noble, he’d probably choose Morgana.”

_ He doesn’t like Morgana _ , said Myrddin.  _ He views her as a sister and nothing more _ . 

“And you are suddenly the big expert on him?” Arthur punched his pillow. “I’ve known him longer than you have.”

_ I know more than you think, Arthur. Sometimes, you can be remarkably obtuse _ . 

“Even if he did feel the same way towards me, it would still be improper,” said Arthur. “There’s still a power difference. And I’d refuse to treat him like a dirty secret.” 

_ You could make him your queen _ , said Myrddin.  _ Then he wouldn’t be a secret at all _ . 

“I have Camelot to think of,” said Arthur. “I have to stay strong for my people. A political alliance would be best.” 

_ I doubt Camelot would care who you marry _ , said Myrddin.  _ As long as you remain king, the people of Camelot will be happy _ . 

“I doubt you know what the people of Camelot would think,” Arthur grumbled. “Stay out of my head, Myrddin.” 

Arthur mulled over the matter and then-- finding no obvious solution-- resolved to never think of Merlin in such a way again. However, when Arthur finally fell asleep, he dreamt of long slender fingers and a teasing pink mouth that was just always out of reach. 


	3. The Magic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this fic was supposed to be three chapters, but this last chapter was so long that I decided to break it up into two. 
> 
> \---
> 
> don't feed the bears

The snow was finally beginning to melt and Arthur, peering out at the bright winter sun, decided that it was an excellent time for a solo hunt (solo meaning him and Merlin, of course). Game would be scarce, but Arthur desperately needed a short reprieve from the weight of the crown. In addition to the general stress of being king during wintertime, the winter months had been marred by a non-lethal but miserable influenza and the unfortunate accidental death of one of Arthur’s father’s advisors. 

Arthur and a grumbling Merlin set out to spend just two days and one night in the forest. When they entered the quiet stillness of the forest, Arthur inhaled the invigorating scent of the trees. As Arthur expected, the forest was still enveloped in the hush of winter with very little animal movement rustling the undergrowth. When Arthur voiced his observation out loud, Merlin launched into a loud tirade against the slaughter of innocent little bunnies and deer that certainly scared off any of the few wildlife that happened to be there. 

“You are a bumbling buffoon who makes hunting a hellish impossibility,” Arthur muttered without malice. 

After a while, Arthur finally caught a few rabbits which Merlin prepared for dinner with a sad little pout on his face. They had just settled in to eat the roasted rabbits when a loud rustle in the forest caused them to look up. A large brown bear emerged from between the trees and padded forward on soft feet towards the fire. 

Arthur picked up his sword and made to attack, but Merlin gripped Arthur’s arm tightly

“It’s just sad and hungry,” Merlin’s breath was warm on Arthur’s neck. “It’s emaciated. It must have smelled the rabbit.” 

“All the more reason to drive it away.” Arthur repositioned his grip on his sword. “We do not want to be its next meal.” 

But Merlin had already tossed his two rabbits to the bear who ate them gratefully and then peacefully lumbered away. 

“See Arthur?” Merlin turned his mournful eyes to Arthur. “He was just hungry. It was a hard winter.” Merlin peered back into the black of the forest with a frown. 

Arthur shook his head and put down the sword. “I should have killed it.” Arthur studied Merlin’s forlorn face. “I can’t believe you had me feeling sorry for a bear.” 

“We are the ones invading the poor bear’s territory.” Merlin made a face at Arthur and sat down by the fire and sipped his drink, having given his rabbits to the bear.

“Well, let’s hope it doesn’t come back and eat us in our sleep now that you’ve decided to start feeding the wildlife.” 

Arthur felt his mouth grow dry as Merlin simply gave him a long look. Merlin’s face was beautiful in the firelight. His eyelashes cast delicate flickering shadows on his face. “Thank you, Arthur,” Merlin said softly. 

“Well, don’t expect me to share my dinner with you.” Arthur sat down by the fire and picked up his rabbit. “If you want a rabbit, you can get one yourself.” 

“I wasn’t that hungry anyway.” Merlin plopped down next to Arthur. “Your eating habits make me lose my appetite.” 

Arthur pushed Merlin and bit into the meat with exaggerating relish. Merlin laughed and shoved Arthur back. Alone with Merlin, in the lingering chill of wintertime, Arthur felt strangely giddy. He allowed himself a small fantasy of what life would be like if he left Camelot, if he spent his days in the forest with Merlin, hunting for a living without a worry about his actions affecting the good of the kingdom.

Arthur ate the rest of his rabbit and offered his second rabbit to Merlin, who declined. Arthur rolled his eyes and shoved the rabbit back at Merlin. “Eat, you soft-hearted fool.” 

After Merlin had finished with the rabbit, they covered themselves in furs and Arthur placed his sword well within reach in case the bear actually did come back. Warm and comfortable, Arthur fell asleep fairly quickly. Arthur was having an absolutely wonderful dream about kissing Merlin, only to awake and find that it wasn’t a dream. In his sleepy befuddlement, Arthur had actually leaned over and kissed Merlin right on the lips. Myrddin murmured something softly in the back of Arthur’s mind, but Arthur ignored him, carefully checking Merlin’s face for any signs of alertness. 

Thankfully, Merlin had not woken up, and Arthur-- embarrassed, mortified, and ashamed-- gave Merlin leave to visit his mother as soon as they returned from the hunting trip. To assuage his guilt, Arthur sent Merlin back with a cartload of gifts for his mother. Merlin protested, saying that while his mother would enjoy the food and fine blankets, she had no use for the five gold engravings of Arthur’s likeness. When Merlin left, Arthur absolutely did not sulk in his rooms and eat pastries for an entire day. 

When Merlin returned at the end of a long boring week, Arthur still felt a painful twinge at the sight of Merlin. Fortunately for Arthur, (but unfortunately for the townspeople), an outbreak of the flux was sweeping its way through the town, so Arthur ordered Merlin to spend all of his time assisting Gaius. Meanwhile, Arthur brooded about the castle trying to rid himself of the troublesome feeling of loss, even though he had lost nothing. He desperately tried to convince himself that he wasn’t avoiding Merlin, but didn’t work in the slightest.

When the outbreak had subsided, Arthur--- running out of excuses--- relieved Merlin from manservant duty for the time being with the pitiful explanation that Merlin deserved a bit of vacation after working so hard. This excuse lasted for naught but a week before Morgana cornered Arthur in his chambers and pitched a hissy fit. 

“Merlin’s moping, Arthur,” Morgana folded her arms and glared at Arthur. “He’s done nothing wrong. Why would you punish him like this?” 

“Moping? I would think he would be happy to spend time running off to the tavern.” Arthur opened his mouth, unsure of how to explain to Morgana that he was afraid of unconsciously tainting Merlin’s virtue. “I-I simply think that less time away from me would make it harder for me to inadvertently take advantage of him---- or any servant really---” 

To his surprise, Morgana burst into laughter. “Gwaine’s gotten to you, hasn’t he?” 

“What-- I-- no--” Arthur stammered, flushing red for some inconceivable reason. 

“Gwaine’s very protective of Merlin,” explained Morgana. “A little too protective. If you ask me, I think someone needs to give Merlin a great big shove.” Morgana shoved Arthur in the chest and he stumbled back with the force of it. 

Arthur stared at her in bewilderment. “Have you gone mad?” Arthur remembered the angry Morgana from his dreams, but this Morgana simply looked like the cat that got the cream. 

“If I were you, I wouldn’t be worried about Merlin being taken advantage of,” said Morgana. “I’d be more worried about him missing out on certain...life experiences.” Morgana flipped her hair over her shoulder, rolled her eyes and walked to the door. As she got to the door, she turned back to face Arthur. 

“Arthur,” Morgana raised an eyebrow. 

“Yes?” asked Arthur. 

“Reinstate Merlin or you will live to regret it.” Morgana twirled out of the room and Arthur sat down on his bed utterly befuddled. 

_ I think you have more control than you give yourself credit for _ , commented Myrddin.  _ The real issue is you wrongly think Merlin will never reciprocate your feelings, so you send him away to spare yourself the pain of rejection _ . 

“You don’t know anything about me or my feelings,” grumbled Arthur. “Go away.”

Reflecting on the situation, Arthur realized that he missed Merlin, so Arthur ordered Merlin to return to full duties as Arthur’s manservant the next day. However, when Merlin came to wake Arthur, Arthur was disappointed to find a subdued and quiet Merlin serving him breakfast. Throughout the day, Merlin was irritatingly deferential to Arthur, bowing and calling him sire, without any hint of a sly grin or any whisper of a cheeky comment. After suffering through three terribly boring days with a grim-faced Merlin, Arthur finally ordered Merlin to stay after he had finished his evening duties. Merlin sat in a chair with no comment, eyes down respectfully.

Arthur pulled up a chair and sat besides Merlin. “Are you ill?” 

“What?” Merlin looked up in surprise and finally met Arthur’s eyes. 

“You have been annoyingly competent in the past few days. It’s bothering me.” Despite his words, Arthur tried to make his tone gentle. 

“Annoyingly competent--?” For a second, the light was back in Merlin’s eyes, but he lowered them to look at his knees once more. “Apologies, sire. What would you have me do?” 

“Merlin.” Arthur reached out and lifted Merlin’s chin. “Something isn’t right. As your king, I demand to know.” 

Merlin’s eyes looked somewhere over Arthur’s shoulder and he blinked rapidly. “You tried rather hard to get rid of me. Don’t think I didn’t notice.” Merlin’s voice was soft and vulnerable in a way that terrified Arthur. 

Arthur leaned back in his chair and his stomach clenched with guilt. He had unintentionally punished Merlin for his own crime. Arthur shook his head. “Don’t be ridiculous Merlin. You may be a dollop head, an oaf, and quite possibly a drunkard, but you are  _ my _ manservant and I’m afraid no one else will do.” 

Arthur expected a smile and a cheeky response, but to his surprise, Merlin leaned forward and looked directly into Arthur’s eyes. “I’d be content to serve you for as long as I live. You are my de-- Serving you is my destiny.” 

Unsure what to do with Merlin’s face so close to his, Arthur clapped Merlin heavily on the shoulder. Merlin finally smiled at Arthur and Arthur’s shoulders relaxed. 

The next day, Merlin was back to his normal irritating self, though he didn’t smile as much as usual. Arthur felt a bit of tension he had been holding in his body relax when Merlin snarked back at him during breakfast. 

With Merlin more or less back to normal, Arthur decided to focus his energy on his next big task: rewriting the laws of the land to allow common-born men to be knighted. Arthur found that Merlin enjoyed discussing the topic with Arthur, so Arthur made sure to update Merlin on the progress everyday after dinner. After many infuriating conversations with ancient mumbling lords and his father’s old conservative advisors, he was finally able to knight Gwaine, Lancelot, Percival and Elyan who had more than proved themselves to be worthy knights. 

The best part of the ceremony wasn’t the delicious dessert pudding, the ecstatic voices of the new knights, or the festive atmosphere. The best part of the ceremony by far was watching Merlin smile, a great big smile that crinkled the corners of Merlin’s eyes. Arthur couldn’t imagine why, but it looked like hope had returned to Merlin’s face. When Merlin caught Arthur staring at him, he smiled wider and winked. Arthur nodded in a very kingly manner at Merlin and fought down the ecstatic thumping of his heart. 

***

  
  


As winter turned into spring, the warmer weather ushered in a variety of visitors to Camelot. The visit Arthur looked forward to the least was the diplomatic visit of Prince Catigern from the kingdom of Powys. Prince Catigern was the son of King Vortigern, who had been killed by Arthur’s father in a war many years ago. When King Uther died, Arthur received a message from King Vortigern’s eldest son, King Vortimer, expressing sympathy for Uther’s death and suggesting that they put the feud of their fathers behind them for the sake of peace. In the spirit of reconciliation, Arthur invited diplomats from Powys to visit Camelot for a month. Vortimer wrote Arthur with his intentions of sending his brother Prince Catigern with an assortment of knights and servants.

Arthur’s time had been consumed with meetings with his political advisors on how to best maintain a peaceful, if not friendly, relationship with Prince Catigern. It was decided that it would be best for Camelot to display its military might without appearing overly aggressive. The meetings finally culminated in a plan to organize a tournament during Catigern’s visit, both for entertainment and to exhibit the fighting skills of the knights. 

To his great disappointment, Arthur was not to fight in this tournament, but instead was tasked with entertaining Catigern. Fortunately for Arthur, Catigern was exceedingly good at making small talk, always jabbering away about something or another. On the whole, the visit went exceedingly well with a successful tournament beautifully showcasing Camelot’s power. Arthur was feeling really good about everything until his conversation with Catigern on the last day of the tournament. 

“You have some very good knights here, Arthur,” Catigern had said as Lancelot was crowned the champion of the tournament. 

“Thank you, Prince Catigern.” Arthur tried not to let his pride show on his face. “They work very hard.” 

Catigern turned to face Arthur with a sly look in his eyes. “I’ve heard that you are bringing brazen new ideas to the concept of knighthood.” 

“Eh?” Busy clapping for Lancelot, Catigern’s comment drifted by Arthur with no cause for concern.

“Those knights in the top five,” murmured Catigern as if telling a secret. “I’ve heard that only Sir Leon comes from noble stock.” 

Arthur nodded and glanced at Catigern, suddenly suspicious. “The rest more than proved their loyalty. They are some of my most talented knights.” 

Catigern gave a quiet chuckle. “Your disregard for tradition is so very interesting to witness firsthand,” Catigern’s voice was mild, but there was an edge to his smile. “The system has worked excellently for the past hundreds of years, and yet here you are, unwriting the divine power invested in us. I admire the strength of your courage, as you must be very bold to believe your rule can outweigh the sagacity of the gods.” 

Arthur hated the arrogant look on Catigern’s face. “If you have an opinion on the matter, please speak freely.” 

“One can only hope that your novel alterations don’t rebound upon you.” Catigern put an arm around Arthur and squeezed his shoulders a little too hard. “I’ve heard stories of kings who stray from the tested and tried practices of tradition and run their kingdom into the ground. But I’m sure you’ve given this decision much thought, haven’t you, Arthur?”

“Honoring tradition is an essential aspect of maintaining Camelot’s sense of pride and culture,” Arthur said, fighting to keep his voice calm and mild. “But a good king can balance respect for the past with needed improvements in the present.” 

“Good, good,” nodded Catigern. “It’d be a pity if this beautiful kingdom of Camelot were to fall.” Catigern swept an arm out at the cheering crowds and sighed deeply. 

“It’d be a pity indeed.” Arthur nodded towards Lancelot, who was shaking hands with Gwaine. “Fortunately, I have the best men to defend it should there be any threat.” 

***

Though Arthur knew he made the right decision to make Gwaine, Percival, Elyan, and Lancelot knights, he couldn’t shake Prince Catigern’s words from his mind when he lay in bed later that night.

_ Go to sleep, Arthur _ , Myrddin said.  _ You did the right thing. Remember Catigern is not your friend. He is an excellent political strategist _ . 

“What if he’s right?” Arthur folded his arms behind his head and glared at the canopy above his bed. “What if this is the beginning of the end for Camelot? I’m a young king. I don’t have the experience of my father. Yet I am already making great changes to Camelot.”

_ What type of place do you want Camelot to be? Answer that, and you’ll have your answer _ . 

Arthur sighed and rolled over to sit on the side of his bed. “I think I want to go on a ride,” said Arthur. “Clear my head.” 

_ There’s not much to clear. _ Myrddin snickered quietly.  _ It’s always been rather empty. _

Arthur threw on a tunic and bounded out of the door to his chambers. He nodded at the guards stationed outside his room and swept down the empty halls of Camelot. On his way to the stables, as he passed Morgana’s room, Arthur thought he heard a man’s voice inside. 

“Do you hear that?” Arthur paused in the corridor. There was no one else in this section of the castle, not even the guards.

_ Hear what? _ . 

Arthur crept closer to the door. He listened intently and clearly heard a female voice speak and a male voice laugh. 

“Is that a man’s voice in her room?” Arthur asked. “Do you think Morgana’s in trouble?”

_ Nope _ , said Myrddir.  _ It sounds like something you shouldn’t be interrupting _ . 

“What do you mean by that?” 

_ You know _ , Myrddin paused for a bit as if mulling over his words.  _ Having a little late night intimate bonding session. _

“She wouldn’t do that,” scoffed Arthur. “That is improper!” 

_ What’s improper is spying on Morgana in the middle of the night _ , said Myrddir. _ Go riding. _

“I’m the king,” said Arthur. “I can do what I want.”

_ I’m the king _ , mocked Myrddin.  _ I can do what I want. _

Arthur knocked on the door. “Morgana, are you alright?”

There was a sudden silence, then a crash. 

“Morgana!” cried Arthur pounding harder on the door. “Should I get the guards?” 

“No, no, no,” called Morgana from inside the room. She opened the door a crack and peaked her head out. “Keep your voice down, Arthur. You’ll wake the whole castle.” 

“Is there someone in there with you?” Arthur tried to subtly peer past Morgana into her room. 

“No,” said Morgana unconvincingly as a crash came from within the room. 

“Really? Can I come in then?” Arthur lowered his voice and whispered, “Should I get the guards? Blink if you are in trouble.” 

Morgana fixed Arthur with a scrutinizing stare before she rolled her eyes. “Oh, come in, Arthur, you meddling prat.” 

Arthur strolled in the doorway just in time to see Merlin sliding halfway under Morgana’s bed. “Merlin!” Arthur stared at Merlin’s boots poking out from under the bed. “What do you think you are doing?”

“Oh, me?” Merlin wiggled back out from under the bed and gave Arthur a guilty smile. “Morgana has a problem with bedbugs and asked me to see if I could put a bit of Gaius’s potion on them.” Merlin jiggled a jar of purple liquid in his right hand. 

“Surely this is something that can wait until morning?” asked Arthur. “Or something Gwen could help with?”

“Oh, we didn’t want to wake Gwen. Not at this hour. And Merlin was just passing by.” Morgana smiled at Arthur. Arthur looked back suspiciously.

“Yeah, Gwen can get kind of…you know.” Merlin gestured vaguely with his hand.

“Can get kind of what?” Arthur tilted his head and frowned at Merlin.

“Yes, Merlin.” Morgana raised one intimidating eyebrow. “Gwen can get kind of...?” 

“Grumpy!” Merlin beamed brightly. “They call her grumpy Gwen down at the kitchen.” 

“Gwen,” said Arthur slowly. “Lovely sweet Gwen can be grumpy?

“Yes.” Morgana nodded as if she didn’t quite believe it herself. “She does need her sleep.” 

Arthur sighed. “Merlin. You cannot be in Morgana’s room, under her bed, in the night.” 

“Yes, Arthur.” 

“And Morgana,” said Arthur. “You can’t be fraternizing with the servants at this time of night! Even--” 

“You fetch the servants for things at all times of the night!” interjected Morgana. 

“Even if they want to,” Arthur continued to explain. “You have power to revoke your affections, but they do not! ” 

“What on earth are you implying, Arthur?” asked Morgnana. “Do you of all people really want to go there?” 

“I- I-,” sputtered Arthur. “I think you know what I’m implying. And I’ll let it go this time, but it will never happen again, do you understand me?” 

“You are being ridiculous, Arthur.” Morgana gave Arthur an amused smile. “Stop projecting your own insecurities onto me. Unlike you, I do not harbor any ridiculous crushes on anyone--- servant or not. Furthermore, while you may be king of Camelot, I believe I have jurisdiction over my own bedchambers. Do I not have that right?” 

“Fine. Do what you want,” Arthur folded his arms across his chest. “But Merlin is my servant. He answers to me.” 

“Are you jealous, Arthur?” smirked Morgana. 

“No!” cried Arthur. “It is just… improper for a male servant and a lady to be in the same room in the middle of the night.” 

The corner’s of Morgana’s mouth twitched twice before she looked up at the ceiling and seemed to compose herself. “Alright, Arthur,” said Morgana. “For the sake of your fragile ego, you shall never find Merlin in my rooms at night ever again.” 

“I’m pretty sure I got all the bed bugs anyway!” Merlin sprang up with a dorky little grin. 

Morgana eyed Merlin with exaggerated flirtatiousness and winked. “Maybe I should sleep in your bed, Merlin. Just in case you didn’t get all of them.” Morgana turned to give Arthur a patronizing smile. “Don’t lose your head, Arthur. That was a joke.” 

Arthur seethed. “Come on, Merlin.” 

“Goodnight, Arthur.” Morgana turned to Merlin and winked. “Goodnight, love of my life.” Morgana blew a kiss at Merlin, who blushed. Arthur growled and dragged Merlin out of Morgana’s chambers. 

As Arthur marched Merlin back to their own chambers, Arthur felt betrayed in a way he couldn’t explain. “I can’t believe you, Merlin,” Arthur grumbled. “If my father were still alive, you would be whipped.”

“I was looking at bed bugs!” protested Merlin. “I don’t want to look at Morgana. I have no desire for her whatsoever.” Merlin said the last statement with such force that Arthur looked at Merlin in surprise. Merlin looked more than upset-- he looked terrified. 

Arthur frowned. “You know I wouldn’t have you whipped, Merlin.”

Merlin gave Arthur a smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Arthur grew concerned. 

“I understand that this is a sensitive topic, but if Morgana ever took advantage of you, I can protect you.” 

Now the smile reached Merlin’s eyes. “Morgana would never. Morgana had some pressing issues on her mind and we were merely having a chat.” 

“Alright, Merlin,” Arthur said, stopping in front of Merlin’s room. “You better bring my breakfast on time tomorrow.”

“Of course, my lord,” Merlin bowed and smiled softly. “Good night, Arthur.”

Arthur fell to sleep quickly, all thoughts about Catigern driven out of his head. 

***

The next day, Arthur rose in an excellent mood. Prince Catigern was set to leave Camelot after a very long month and Arthur was quite content to never think about the kingdom of Powys ever again. But before he left, Catigern came to Arthur in private to ask a favor. He requested to leave two knights behind, as a servant had gone missing. Catigern believed the servant had stolen money from him and wished the knights bring the servant to justice. Arthur begrudgingly accepted Catigern’s request in the interest of keeping the peace between the two kingdoms. However, Arthur instructed his guards to keep a close watch on the two knights.

Arthur’s thoughts quickly strayed from Catigern’s men because Merlin was acting much stranger than usual. Arthur couldn’t figure out why Merlin kept ducking off into strange corners like some sort of scavenging dog on the hunt for scraps. Then around midday, Merlin disappeared for nearly an hour before arriving back with strange red marks around his wrists that deepened into bruises as the night fell. When pressed, Merlin said he went to the tavern for a quick drink, lost his balance and fell. However, Arthur privately thought that the marks seemed to look like injuries from a tightly gripped hand.

Throughout the week, more dark smudges appeared on Merlin’s pale skin. Merlin explained them off as bumping into a table or tripping on the cobblestones. Arthur gently teased Merlin for his clumsiness, but couldn’t help being worried all the same. But when Merlin brought in Arthur’s breakfast with a hoarse voice one morning, Arthur finally had to speak up. 

“Merlin.” Arthur grabbed the breakfast tray out of Merlin’s hands and put it firmly on a table. “What’s this on your neck?” Arthur shoved Merlin into a chair and folded his arms. 

“It’s a neckerchief, sire,” Merlin said slowly. “It’s a piece of fabric--”

“I know what your neckerchief is, you idiot,” Arthur interrupted Merlin. “But what is the bruising on your neck?” 

Merlin looked surprised. “I tightened my neckerchief too tight yesterday. It may have caused some bruising. I bruise easily.” He grinned sheepishly at Arthur.

“Tell me, Merlin.” Arthur ran a gentle finger on the pale skin above Merlin’s neckerchief and Merlin shivered. “Does your neckerchief have fingers?” 

“No?” Merlin’s eyes darted back and forth like he was nervous. 

“Because I can clearly see finger marks on your neck,” Arthur bent down to look Merlin in the eye. “Who did this to you, Merlin?” 

“No one,” Merlin shook his head vehemently. “I don’t remember anyone strangling me. Nope. Think I would remember that.” 

“You are a terrible liar, Merlin. I command you to tell me.” Arthur put a hand on Merlin’s shoulder. “What happened?”

“Nothing worth concerning the king about.” Merlin looked at the floor and shook his head. “If you don’t believe me, you can send me to the stocks.” 

Arthur carefully untied Merlin’s neckerchief and assessed the bruises on his neck with gentle fingers. He could feel Merlin swallow under his fingertips. “Believe it or not, Merlin, I have come to care for you over the past few years. If someone-- anyone-- has been causing you physical harm, I will protect you, no matter if this person is a noble or a servant. I won’t have them strangling my manservant in my own castle.” Arthur’s stomach boiled with rage, but he kept the anger he felt out of his voice, for fear of spooking Merlin. 

Merlin bowed his head. “I appreciate that, my lord.” 

Arthur’s fingers had now ceased their gentle exploration and had unconsciously begun gently stroking Merlin’s neck in a comforting manner. Merlin typically only referred to Arthur by his proper title when he was making fun of him, but Merlin wasn’t humorous in this case. Arthur remembered the other time Merlin had been strangely respectful of Arthur-- when he was terrified he was going to lose his job. Arthur felt Merlin’s pulse quicken under his hands. “I know I am the upkeeper of law in Camelot and you may feel uncomfortable confiding in me. However, if you won’t tell me, I would be happy to summon in Morgana to listen without fear of persecution.” 

Merlin licked his lips and looked at Arthur from under his eyelashes. “Nothing happened.”

“Gods, you’re so stubborn.” Arthur ran his hands through his hair. “Alright, Merlin. Run along and get some balm from Gaius for those bruises. And remember, if you ever do want to talk, I will listen with a very open mind.”

Merlin gave Arthur a sad smile, one that Arthur wasn’t entirely sure how to interpret. 

Arthur resolved to keep a closer eye on Merlin to deduce the source of the mysterious injuries for himself. He kept Merlin busy and well within eyesight throughout the days accompanying him to his chambers at night. However, Merlin managed to give him the slip while Arthur began arguing with Geoffrey about the order of the books. 

Arthur searched for Merlin in his chambers, Merlin’s chamber’s, and even Gaius’s rooms. On his way out of Gaius’s rooms, Arthur literally ran into Gwen. She nearly toppled over, before Arthur grabbed her elbow and steadied her. 

“Sire!” Gwen exclaimed, clutching the parcel in her hands delicately. 

“Gwen!” Arthur nodded. “Do you know where Merlin is?” 

“Merlin?” Gwen shook her head. “No, I think he said he was on his way to the tavern to meet a girl.” 

“Meet a girl?” Arthur frowned at Gwen. “Which girl? Why would he meet a girl?” 

Gwen’s eyes widened. “I’m afraid I don’t know sire.” 

“Of course, thank you, Guinivere,” Arthur released his hand from Gwen’s elbow and nodded at her. “Run along then.” 

Gwen rushed off and Arthur spun around to face the stables. He needed to calm down and riding seemed to be the best option. Merlin was probably fine. He was probably at the tavern, doing whatever he does at the all this time.

Arthur had just begun feeling more calm, when he got to the stables. However, when Arthur walked into the stables, he saw Merlin in a dress. Not just any dress: Morgana’s dress. Arthur’s pulse rate felt like it nearly doubled in a few seconds. 

“Merlin!” sputtered Arthur, flushing a deep red for some unfathomable reason. “What on earth are you doing?” 

“Just came down to check on the horses,” Merlin gestured to the horse next to him with a surprisingly graceful sweep of his arm. “Nothing much.” Arthur’s eyes were drawn to how the blue dress brought out the color of Merlin’s stunning eyes and made his skin glow. 

“Nothing?” asked Arthur. “Do you care to explain yourself?” 

“Explain myself?” Merlin lifted his head and served Arthur with an icy glare that Arthur normally received from Morgana.

“The dress?” prompted Arthur. 

“Ah, yes, the dress.” Merlin looked down in surprise as if seeing it for the first time. “Morgana asked me to wear it. She wanted to prove to me how uncomfortable dresses were. We had a bet, you see. And she definitely won the bet.” 

“That’s right!” cried Morgana, appearing from behind a horse in Merlin’s clothes. She tripped on a pile of hay and caught herself on the stable wall, a rare time when Arthur had ever seen her be anything less than pure grace. 

“Morgana!” Arthur frowned. “Are you wearing Merlin’s neckerchief?” 

Morgana adjusted the neckerchief. “So what if I am? It is a dashing state of high fashion.” 

Arthur took a deep breath and tried to control his racing heart. “I understand that you two share a special bond, but please do this inside the castle rather than outside where everyone can see. It is improper for Lady Morgana and the king’s manservant to be swapping clothes in the stable. I hope to never see this sort of behavior again.” He glared at both of them for a good minute before storming out of the stables all the way back to his chambers. Arthur sank down on his chair and rested his head on one hand. He lifted a speech prepared for him that he was meant to memorize, but his eyes didn’t see the paper. All he could see was Merlin in Morgana’s dress. 

After about a half an hour, Arthur hadn’t gotten any further in his speech. He rubbed his eyes. Maybe he was just tired. He had a long day and could probably benefit from going to bed early. He went to lay down on his bed and closed his eyes. But burned into the darkness of his eyelids was Merlin in Morgana’s dress. 

Arthur rubbed his eyes and turned to sleep on his side. When he closed his eyes, he still saw Merlin in Morgana’s dress, but now he was picturing Merlin in his own chambers instead of the stable. The Merlin in his mind began to slowly undo the laces on the dress, before sliding down the dress to reveal his beautiful silken skin and --

Arthur sat up and shook his head. “No, no, no, no, no.” 

_ Is anything the matter _ ? asked Myrddin. 

“No,” said Arthur. “I just -. I was distracted. Distracted by my thoughts.” 

_ A certain boy in a certain dress certainly is very distracting _ , Myrddin sniggered.  _ Having a ~hard~ time falling asleep? _

“No!” Arthur shook his head violently. “I can’t. I won’t.” 

_ Hmmm _ , said Myrddin.  _ I think you could probably benefit from letting off some steam _ . 

“Shut up,” snapped Arthur. “I wish I could evict you from my head.” 

_ Go take a walk _ , said Myrddin. 

“You’re always telling me to take a walk,” grumbled Arthur, but he swung his feet out of bed and left his room. “I’m not a dog.”

As Arthur walked by Merlin’s room, he heard a female voice. Arthur stopped to listen. 

“Morgana,” murmured Arthur recognizing the laughter inside the room. 

_ Just leave them alone _ , said Myrddin.  _ You big creep. _

“I’m not being a creep,” whispered Arthur. “I’m protecting Morgana’s virtue.” 

_ Said like a true creeper _ , commented Myrddin. 

“Be quiet,” said Arthur. He pressed his ear to the door. 

“ **_Forbearnan firgenholtc_ ** ,” Morgana’s voice was strong and powerful through the door. Suddenly a purple light flashed underneath the door and the room shook a little bit. 

Arthur tensed at the sound of a spell being uttered by Morgana. He pressed his ear closer to the door.

“Oh dear,” said Morgana. “That had a little more force to it than I thought.”

“That was wonderful, Morgana,” praised Merlin. “You've improved so much since your last lesson.”

“I’m still out of control,” sighed Morgana. “Fat load of good that will do us against Vortigern’s magicians.” 

“It will do us much good,” Merlin encouraged. “Any help I can get protecting Arthur against Vortigern’s sorcerers is already a step in the right direction.” 

“Speaking of Arthur, I do hope I didn’t wake him up.” 

“Oh don’t worry about him,” laughed Merlin. “He sleeps like a log. I have to call his name five times in the morning just to get him to open his eyes.” 

“I just don’t want him to come barging in here thinking we’re having a midnight tryst like he did last week. Or like today, when he caught us changing bodies and he gave me as you a talk about wearing women’s clothing.” 

“That was a bit awkward,” agreed Merlin. “But better have him think that than have him learn that I’m actually giving you midnight magic lessons.” 

Morgana giggled. “He can be rather dense, can he? He doesn’t even know that your preferences lie with men. I wouldn’t have a chance with you even if I tried. Anyways, from the moment I saw the way he looks at ---” 

Arthur sprung away from the door feeling as though he had been struck with lightning. Arthur had the urge to kick down the door and confront Morgana and Merlin, but when he saw George at the end of the hallway, he reconsidered. Arthur walked briskly down the hallway, nodded towards George, and headed to the training fields. 

_ Do you feel homicidal? _ asked Myrddin hesitantly.  _ Feel like burning people at the stake? I can’t make sense of your mood _ . 

Arthur growled and opened the door to the armory. He grabbed a sword and stomped angrily to the training grounds. He reached a training dummy and swiftly and methodically ripped it apart. 

_ Feeling homicidal, I take it _ , Myrddin commented.  _ I suppose the trifecta of secrets was a lot to take in _ :  _ Merlin’s magic, Morgana’s magic, and Merlin’s sexual preferences.  _

Arthur beheaded the dummy and took a deep breath. “Did you know, Myrddin? About Merlin?” 

_ What about Merlin? _ Myrddin sounded hesitant, almost wary. 

“You know what.” Arthur stood ramrod straight, gripping his sword tightly in his hand. 

_ I have always known that Merlin was a sorcerer _ , said Myrddin.  _ And for Merlin’s preferences, I think anyone with eyes can see that _ . 

“You lied to me.” Arthur slashed through the torso of another training dummy. “Morgana lied to me.” Arthur beheaded the dummy with a grunt. “Merlin lied to me.” Arthur thrust his sword into the heart of the dummy, twisting until straw poured from the torso. 

_ I never lied to you, Arthur _ , said Myrddin.  _ I simply neglected to reveal some truths that I thought should remain hidden for the time being _ .  _ Perhaps I was wrong to withhold them from you for so long, but I thought you weren’t ready _ .  _ This little tantrum seems to be proving my point. _

Arthur yelled in frustration and stabbed the third and final dummy. He slashed away at the dummy until it was only a pile of straw. Arthur viciously kicked the straw until he stubbed his toe on the wooden stake that anchored the dummy to the ground. He sat on the ground and clutched his toe, hot tears pooling in his eyes from the pain. Sitting in the mud in the middle of the darkened training field, Arthur felt very very alone. 

_ Arthur _ , Myrddin’s voice was gentle.  _ Are you alright? _

“My father told me that being king was a lonely job. He said I should trust no one but myself.” Arthur’s voice sounded thin and quiet in the emptiness of the field. “I regret straying from his advice.” 

_ You are not your father, Arthur. Nor should you be _ . 

“It’d be better to be like my father than the laughingstock I am now.” 

_ Arthur. I can’t believe you would think that _ , Myrddin sounded surprised.  _ Your father was an angry, bitter and lonely man. But you, Arthur… you are loved _ . 

“Loved?” Arthur growled. “Pray tell, Myrddin, how on earth am I loved?” 

_ How are you loved? _ Myrddin’s voice was incredulous. 

“I’m feared, mocked and scorned. I’m lied to, and groveled to...” Hot frustrated tears threatened to spill out of Arthur’ eyes. “But loved?” 

_ Do you think that Merlin and Morgana would risk their lives learning magic for anyone?  _

“I don’t know why Merlin and Morgana would learn magic right under my nose except to blatantly defy my rule, if not plot to overthrow me.” 

_ Merlin and Morgana are learning magic to protect you, Arthur. Didn’t you hear what they said in the room? Do you think Merlin uses his magic for anyone but you? _

“I don’t know,” said Arthur. “How can you be sure he used his magic for me at all?” 

_ The secret passageways in Gorre could only be unlocked by magic. The chapalu can only be maimed by magic. The giant could only be felled by magic. Need I go on? _

Arthur frowned. “I didn't even know Merlin played any part in those events.” 

_ Exactly _ , cried Myrddin.  _ Merlin is not motivated by fear of your orders. He does not seek your admiration or approval. Why does he do it then, when in theory, he’d be better off almost anywhere else but the capital of the kingdom that hates his kind? Is there any other answer but love?  _

“I don’t know, Myrddin,” Arthur folded his arms across his chest. “Probably a combination of clumsy accident and sheer idiocy. You know Merlin.”

_ I do know Merlin _ , Myrddin remarked dryly, then sighed deeply.  _ Merlin would die for you in a heartbeat. He would walk the ends of the earth to ensure you were alive and happy. _

“Why should I trust you?” Arthur 

_ Of all people, I have nothing to gain by your death and everything to win by your success. Without you, I do not exist, as useless as a one sided coin _ . 

“I suppose you’ve never led me astray before,” Arthur mused. 

_ What are you going to do? _

“I will do nothing. If you are wrong, I will already have had my eye on Merlin and Morgana to foil whatever plan they may be hatching.” Arthur shook his head and sighed. “And if you are right, I will refrain from murdering two of the people closest to me.”

_ Well, at least you know one thing, _ said Myrddin. 

“What?” asked Arthur. 

_ Merlin and Morgana are not an item. _

For some reason, this caused Arthur to smile. 

_ That cheered you up, didn’t it?  _

Arthur tried to school his face into a more serious expression. “I am merely pleased that both Morgana and Merlin’s honor remains intact.” 

_ Of course, sire _ , said Myrddin.  _ Just keep telling yourself that _ .  _ You’re happy that Merlin isn’t romantically interested in Morgana _ . 

“Yes,” said Arthur. “That would cause lots of problems.”

_ Uh huh _ , Myrddin sounded like he was holding back laughter.  _ I told you he didn’t like her. He’s got moon eyes for someone else, but you’re too dumb to see it _ . 

“I don’t wish to see his moon eyes, thank you very much.”

_ You want to see his moon eyes _ .  _ You want to see his moon eyes looking at you. Which you would, if you had a brain _ . 

“Shut up, Myrddin,” ordered Arthur. “A king needs a good night of rest.” 

***

Arthur avoided Merlin and Morgana as much as possible for a good week. He sent Merlin to do the most vile tasks as far away from Arthur as possible. He took meals in his room and spent every hour he was not sleeping training with his knights. Arthur ignored Myrddin’s mutterings about a fully grown adult man throwing a giant tantrum and pushed himself harder than ever before. Though he was deeply upset with Merlin, he requested for Leon to keep an eye on Merlin, as Arthur was still concerned about the origin of Merlin’s bruises. 

One evening, Arthur stormed into his room in a huff after a long meeting and stopped when he saw Merlin asleep on the bed. Next to him, Arthur’s armor was happily polishing itself in midair. 

Arthur felt a cold shock at seeing magic being used so blatantly in Camelot. Arthur quickly backed out of the room and shut the door behind him. 

“Is he an idiot?” Arthur asked Myrddin in a hushed whisper. “If a servant walked in, he could be burned at the stake!” 

_ He’s tired from all the chores you keep giving him _ . 

“So he’s an idiot,” said Arthur. Despite himself, he ordered all servants away from his room and returned to the field to beat up some more training dummies. After successfully stabbing enough dummies to dull the edge of whatever feeling was burning in his chest, Arthur returned to his room, tired and sweaty. Merlin was gone, but evidence of his presence remained. Arthur's armor lay shining by his bed and a bath steamed quietly in the corner. 

As Merlin brought Arthur breakfast the next morning, Arthur observed the puce-colored bags under Merlin’s eyes and felt a twinge of guilt. Looking down at his breakfast tray, Arthur noticed that Merlin had managed to bring two spoons. 

“I appreciate the extra effort, but one spoon is quite enough,” Arthur teased mildly holding the extra utensil in the air. 

When Merlin smiled at Arthur, Arthur grew worried. Merlin’s grin lacked its usual vigor and his face was pale and gaunt with tiredness. Arthur frowned and twirled the superfluous spoon between his fingers. 

“You know, Merlin,” Arthur picked up a piece of fruit. “I think you deserve a day off. You’ve been working too much.” 

“Oh, I have?” Merlin asked sarcastically. “You should tell that to the person who assigns me the work.” 

“Very funny, Merlin,” Arthur waved his hand at Merlin. “Go get some rest.” 

Merlin nodded his head and turned to leave. 

“Wait, Merlin!” Arthur called.”Catch!” Arthur tossed the spoon in the air at Merlin. 

Merlin turned around. “What?” The spoon crashed into his arm and clattered to the floor. 

“You were supposed to catch it, you idiot,” laughed Arthur. 

Instead of a witty retort, Merlin only whimpered, clutching his arm. Arthur rose from his seat when he saw a scarlet stain grow on Merlin’s sleeve. “Are you made of glass?” Arthur said derisively before rushing towards Merlin in concern.

“It’s fine.” Merlin pulled his arm away from Arthur’s inquiring hands. “You’re just stronger than you think.” 

“I hardly think that a little spoon could cause so much damage.” Arthur worriedly watched Merlin’s face slowly tighten with pain. “Let me see it.” He tried to reach out for Merlin’s arm, but Merlin jerked it away again. 

“I think you’ve done enough already.” Merlin didn’t meet Arthur's eyes. “I can get Gaius to fix it.” 

“Well, go on then,” said Arthur. “Take another day off. I’ll get someone else to muck out the stables.” 

Merlin turned and left the room without another word. Arthur stood staring at the door in quiet shock.

“I don’t think I threw it that hard.” Arthur carefully examined his hands. They didn’t look any stronger than usual. 

_ You shouldn’t be throwing things at your manservants anyway _ , commented Myrddir.  _ It’s unkingly.  _

“A spoon should not cause that much blood.” Arthur scratched his head in confusion. 

Myrddin sighed.  _ While you were busy moping, there was a plot against your life foiled by Merlin and Morgana. Merlin became injured _ . 

Arthur began to pace by his bed. “He did, did he?” asked Arthur and for some reason he felt very angry. “Why doesn’t he trust me, Myrddin?” 

_ He’s terrified _ . 

“Terrified?” 

_ He’s terrified of losing his life and his friends. He’s also terrified of losing you. He doesn’t wish to put you in a position where you are forced to choose between him and Camelot.  _

Arthur frowned thoughtfully. Perhaps there could be a remedy for that. 

***

Merlin returned to Arthur’s service in two days. Though the spring was back in Merlin’s step, Arthur noticed that Merlin’s face was still drawn and tired, as if he had spent the past two days working hard and not resting. 

Growing perturbed by Merlin’s fatigue and strange injuries, Arthur ordered Merlin to stay inside his chambers and mend his clothes. Arthur didn’t want Merlin rushing about and getting even more injured. Arthur left Merlin inside his chambers sewing up a pair of Arthur’s trousers to attend yet another meeting about amending the grain tax.

When Arthur left the meeting, he was surprised to see a familiar red neckerchief disappear around the corridor. Arthur hurriedly pursued Merlin. He watched bemusedly as Merlin rather obviously tried to sneak down the hall.

“Let’s hope we never need to rely on Merlin for any subtle tracking.” Arthur grinned in amusement as Merlin ducked behind a column, his long limbs remaining fully visible. 

_ This is rather more embarrassing than I remembered _ , Myrddin muttered.

Arthur followed Merlin deep into the depths of the castle, until Merlin finally stopped before a giant chasm. To Arthur’s shock, a huge chained dragon rose up from the darkness and Merlin began to speak. 

“Is Merlin talking to that great bloody big dragon?” Arthur whispered, tightening his grip on his sword, ready to fend off the dragon. “Is he actually an imbecile?” 

To Arthur’s surprise, the dragon did not roast Merlin in a stream of fire or eat him, but instead began what sounded like a friendly conversation.

Arthur’s concern for Merlin turned to anger. “Magic is one thing, but is he conspiring with the dragon?” Arthur clutched his sword and debated making himself visible just to give Merlin the scare of his life. 

_ It is true that he speaks with the dragon _ , Myrrddin responded with a tone in his voice that Arthur couldn’t quite place.  _ I urge you to not do something rash that you may end up regretting _ .  _ The dragon is more useless than you think. He mostly gives confusing advice that Merlin doesn’t follow. _

“Is this a joke?” asked Arthur. “My manservant--- my friend--- scheming with a dragon-” Arthur’s voice broke and before he could do something rash, he turned to exit the dark chamber, making his way to the training field.

_ He is still your friend _ , soothed Myrddin.  _ There is no one more loyal to you than Merlin _ . 

“How can you say that?” Arthur clenched his fists in frustration. “How can you know that? He committed treason. He’s clearly associating with the enemy. If that is not the mark of an evil sorcerer, I do not know what is.” 

_ I have eyes _ , commented Myrddin dryly.  _ And a brain. Anyone with both can see Merlin’s loyalty and friendship, which explains why you are so blatantly unaware _ .

“Do you have eyes though, Myrddin? Being in my head and all?” Arthur pondered this for a second, then he shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. Merlin lied to me one too many times. He lied about his magic. He lied about where he would be this afternoon. He lied for years.”

_ He was afraid, Arthur _ , said Myrddin.  _ Think about it _ .  _ In Camelot, magic is punishable by death. _

“How do I know he’s not in cahoots with you?” asked Arthur. “You certainly seemed to know a lot about that dragon.” 

Myrddin laughed at that, a sad sounding laugh.  _ How would I be in cahoots with him? In case you forgot, I’m stuck inside your woefully thick head.  _

Arthur shrugged, but didn’t bother to answer. He privately suspected that if Myrddin had any real power, he’d do more than hang out and complain in Arthur’s head all day. 

_ What do you plan to do? _

“I’m not sure yet,” said Arthur. “I haven’t decided”

_ Why not?  _

“He could be an evil sorcerer,” said Arthur. “He could have planted you in my head, Myrddin,. Making me hear voices.” 

_ Is your head full of cabbage? Why would he do that? _

“Sometimes you even sound a bit like Merlin.” 

Myrddin sighed. _S_ __t_ op being so paranoid.  _

“Maybe he wants to kill me,” speculated Arthur, “Or make me kill myself, which is why he put such an annoying ass in my head.” 

Arthur finally made his way to the training grounds and began a long and grueling training session with the knights. Arthur fueled his rage into the strength of his blows, feeling the anger slowly leave his body as his mind focused solely on the feel of the ground beneath his feet and the weight of the sword in his hand. 

The training session was interrupted by an scruffy emaciated dog with a stiff leg running onto the field. As Arthur watched Sir Kay try to shoo the dog off the field, Arthur couldn’t help but to think that if Merlin was here, he’d have made sure the dog was comfortable and fed. The dog’s visible ribs reminded Arthur of the scraggly bear that Arthur had almost killed in the woods. Arthur remembered Merlin’s expression when watching the bear. Merlin did always have a soft spot for animals, even large and terrifying ones. Arthur imagined Merlin’s sympathy would likely extend to an imprisoned dragon. After all, Merlin was kindhearted to the point of idiocy. 

Arthur ended practice with much of his anger at Merlin depleted. Making sure none of his knights were watching, Arthur found the dirty little dog hiding behind the armory and took it to the stables, ordering a servant to feed it and let it sleep inside. When Arthur made it back to his chambers, he was ready to say something to Merlin, though he wasn’t sure what. Arthur opened the door to see Merlin curled up in a chair, mending one of Arthur’s tunics. When Merlin saw Arthur at the door, he bounded out of his chair with a smile, somehow managing to fall over whilst doing so. 

The little rage left in Arthur entirely deflated when Merlin sheepishly looked up at him with those beautiful blue eyes. Looking at Merlin sprawled out on the floor, Arthur was suddenly convinced that Merlin was not a threat in any way. Even if he was evil, he’d probably accidentally kill himself before he managed to kill Arthur. 

“Rough day?” asked Merlin, lifting himself off the floor. 

“What?” Arthur bent down to help Merlin up, concerned the clumsy fool would topple right back down. 

“You look all red and shouty,” noted Merlin and his lip quirked up in amusement. 

Arthur shook his head. “Shut up, Merlin.” Arthur stepped forward and sighed. “I have been rather short with you lately.” 

Merlin rolled his eyes. “Is this about the spoon incident? My wrist is healing quite well.” He thrust his bandaged arm into Arthur’s face and threw the mended shirt at Arthur’s head. 

Arthur sputtered under the shirt. “Merlin! I--” He brushed the shirt from his face and it fell onto the floor. 

“Save your apologies,” said Merlin. “I forgive you-- really.” Merlin gave Arthur a cheery smile and bounced out the door. 

Arthur looked at his newly mended shirt lying on the dirty floor. “The worst servant ever,” he muttered. 

_ I take it you are keeping him? _ Myrddin said.  _ Evil sorcerer and all? _

Arthur shook his head. “Merlin couldn’t be an evil sorcerer. He can barely mend a shirt without hurting himself.” Arthur picked up the shirt and examined it, observing a freshly torn hole. “And the shirt.”

_ Merlin’s not an evil sorcerer _ .  _ Remember the feeling you got when the giant was here? Now, that was evil magic _ . 

Arthur chewed his lip in thought. “You are right. When I get near Merlin, all I feel is all sort of warm and tingly. It’s a really nice feeling.” 

_ That sounds like a just-you thing _ , laughed Myrddin.  _ I don’t think that is because of Merlin’s magic _ . 

“What do you mean by that?” asked Arthur. 

_ Figure it out yourself _ . 


End file.
